Leaving for Good.

I waited in the darkness, my heart pounding. The snore came again, a loud congestive breathing from the room down the hall, drowning out the other small noises of the night. I pushed my covers back and swung my legs down, my stocking feet making no sound on the worn boards beneath them. I paused again before standing up, afraid to move without my cover. If they caught me, it would be months before they would let their guard down again. I had played the game for nearly a year now, long enough for them to think I had forgotten, had given up all thoughts of escape. But I had not, never would. They didn't truly know me if they thought I would ever give up anything. That thought froze me as I realized I was. Giving up something, that is. I was leaving my brother behind. Rationalizing it with the thought that he was a favorite here, and not in any danger, only framed it in my mind as an excuse. I shook my head, my curls bouncing. I would come back for him later. Right now, I had to go. I would never get a chance like this again.

The window was sticking. I yanked at it as hard as I dared, I didn't need it coming loose, all of a sudden, and banging into the sill. The snorer choked, recovered and then continued snoring, oblivious to everything. He wasn't the one I was worried about, though. It was the one sleeping next to him, I wanted to avoid waking. But as long as he snored, she wouldn't hear anything, so I pulled steadily until the window was open enough for me to squeeze out. Then I pushed it until it looked closed in the dim light of the sliver of moon showing through the trees overhead. I suppressed a shout of glee. Finally, I was free!

I straightened my clothes, checked that I had my bag, and crept carefully until I was off the gravel they had placed under my windows.

Thumbing my nose at the dark patch the house had become, I followed the well-worn path down past the garden and the grandparents' trailer, to the tunnel of manzanita that led down to the railroad tracks we lived beside. By now my eyes were well adjusted to the lack of light and I could see well enough to traverse the trail. It meandered, but I had used it often in the five years since we had moved here, and knew my way along it well.

Emerging from the thick bushes, I made my way carefully down the steep hill in the dark, the soft red dirt helping in my quest to stay silent.

The short walk into town got my heart beating fast again, this time with excitement. What would it be like to live on my own? With no one to use me for slave labor or a scapegoat, I would truly be free! I turned around one last time, seeing the hulking shape of the water tower rising above the hill it stood upon, hovering over the house like a mother hen guarding her chicks. It's okay. I thought toward the woman I had left behind in bed with the snorer. You don't have to love me. You don't even have to try anymore because I'm never going to be your daughter. Turning back, I stepped into the car that had just pulled up beside me, and closed the door.