Necessities

I need to cut again

I need to slice up my body until

you can't see the flaws

I need to do it.

I feel like a drug addict,

I'm suffering withdrawal.

I need to see blood leak from

small lines.

It's funny how much damage

a few lines can cause.

Isn't that what letters are,

just little lines?

If they are, then

lines is what destroyed me,

and lines is what rebuilds me.

If this seems too graphic,

If so, then

take a look at statistics,

because, of suicide,

the victims becoming more and more.

How to rebuild

the fragile trust of my parents

to convince me to stop

before I go too deep?

When the closest friends can't stop me,

how can anyone else?

Why can't I force my miserable brain to

understand the consequences?

My parents have the mistaken impression that

taking everything out of my room,

cutting me off from my friends,

will save me.

But what would really save me

is a child confidant,

not some professional writing everything I say down.

I have the right to remain silent,

because everything I say can and will be used against me.

It's not just

in a court of law.

It's in me.

What do I need?

If only I knew.