Roommate Pt.1

It suddenly occurred to me that observing my roommate's behavior was exactly as I'd expect primate observation to be.

He has no real mechanical skills to speak of. It's as if his fingers are large, fixed objects without dexterity that are just shoved into objects he wishes to manipulate. The subject has a very careless, harsh, somewhat caveman-like way of handling objects.

Most of what he touches ends up damaged and what he works on poorly done.

The subject also displays some type of constant intestinal disorder that causes him to have chronic diarrhea and gas. He uses the facilities without shame. No running water, air vent, or post-doo doo spray. Therefore, you hear and smell every intimate deposit. He farts, out loud, roughly every 20 mins whether it be mid-sentence during conversation or in a room full of guests. There is no holding it in for a more appropriate time and/or place. That would take a bit of work, class, and consideration for others. None of which are the subject's strong suits. The gas gets forcefully pushed out as soon as the feeling arises.

It's as simple as that.

Every morning he goes outside for a morning cigarette and blows a "snot rocket" from each nostril, right to left, and wipes his nose with his bare hand before rubbing it on whatever clothing he happens to have thrown on in his barely waking state.

I will keep studying the subject in his natural habitat and report back with any new developments.