The Last Conversation

“How have you been, Sidney?”

“I am doing fine. How about you, Arianna?”

“I am okay. How come you are calling me Arianna? You used to call me Anna. By the way, you put on too much weight. You should lose some weight.”

“You are right. I badly need to shed some.”

“You are not going to say anything about how I still look? I remember, you used to adore me as if I was an angel. You would often say, ‘I not only had the look, but I also had the heart of an angel’.”

“Honestly, you had the heart of an angel. You always thought of others first; in fact, you were the most unselfish person I ever met. You were a true larger than life person. I am sure you still are – an angel is forever.”

“So, you are not going to say anything about how I still look!”

“Arianna, I cannot comment on your looks. Today, you are happily married to someone else.”

“I do understand that. Yet, since we are meeting after 25 years, I would love to hear from you how I still look. When we were together, you always made me feel wonderful about myself. You always encouraged me to work on my talent. I really miss that. Today, I am like a production machine; as long as the production continues at the right pace, everyone is happy, or else the eyebrows are raised. Back then, I loved pizza but you didn’t. However, whenever we talked about any fast foods, you insisted on pizza, with all the toppings after my heart. I used to be embarrassed, but you wouldn’t listen. Now, when we talk about pizzas, nobody ever wants to know if I have any preferences. You took so good care of me. Whenever I am upset or lonely, I just think of those happy days to lift myself up. By the way, do you remember our first fight?”

“I didn’t know we had a fight.”

“Over Kramer vs. Kramer. It was a newly released movie and I really wanted to watch that, but you were, as usual, looking for an old movie that would not attract any crowd, so you could touch, hug and kiss me inside the theatre, any which way you wanted. You used to be so crazy about me. When we were together, you always had a big smile. We never felt bored with each other. I still remember how you used to look at me when I was ready to leave or you dropped me off. Then again, we could not wait to see each other the next morning. I really miss that.”

“Do you still sing? You had a wonderful talent in singing,” Sidney reluctantly asked.

“Not really. See, after I got married, nobody ever encouraged me to continue to nurture my talents. My husband was aware of my singing talent, but he didn’t think I needed to take it to the next level. But he did encourage me to complete my master’s degree and I actually did. Of course, my passion was singing and I would have loved to pursue that, at least as a hobby. Remember, I had to bug you to teach me an Indian song and later I got so good at it. You were not only a great lover, but you were also a wonderful mentor. You always tried to bring the best out of me. I really miss that. If I had married you, I know life would have been so different…”

“Arianna, you cannot even dream of, how miserable I was after you left me. I was so used to being with you. You ran around with me for three years, and then suddenly dropped the bombshell that you had decided to dump me for another man. It was like a bolt from the blue. I wish you had come to that decision after three months, not after three years.”

“I got carried away by listening to all the wrong folks. They all convinced me our inter-racial marriage would never work as we came from very different backgrounds. Of course, now I know I will meet them all in hell, again. Even after I walked off, I know you said all the good things about me to my mother. You once said ‘if we don’t make it in this life, we should at least be reunited in heaven’. After what I have done to you, I know I am doomed for hell.”

“Arianna, you are unnecessarily being harsh at yourself. Angels are forever, and when it’s your time, the Lord will love to take you back to the heaven. Anyway, I was aware of your trepidation. We all grow up in a box – one race, one religion and consequently one monolithic culture. We are naturally apprehensive of the competing boxes, but I thought you had the heart and character to rise above that petty mindset and decide on your own. To make things easy for you, I gave you every option under the sun. I just wanted you to marry me. Considering you would be uncomfortable with your world in dealing with the children from the mixed parentage, I went to the extent to suggest that we would not even have children. And, I meant every word I had said. Of course, at the end, I realized I fell short. I must also say, even after you left, I never cherished a drop of venom towards you. You were an angel and I always remembered you that way. What happened? You are still a cry baby! I am sorry; I opened up that old wound. It was totally unnecessary and mean. I apologize.”

“You are completely wrong. At that time, I was concerned only about myself, not of our future generation. If I were at peace with myself, I would be perfectly fine with our kids. In fact, I always thought, kids from the mixed parentage look more attractive. Please blame my judgment, not my character.”

“Again, I am sorry, I even I talked about our past. Your husband must be a prominent person to be invited to a Senator’s private party?”

“They are golf buddies. They were at Yale Law together. You must be prominent too?”

“It’s my wife who is prominent. She wants me to meet the Senator.”

“Hi mom. I was looking for you all over.”

“Sidney, this is my daughter, Pam. Pam, Mr. Sidney Khanna is my old friend.”

“Pam, I understand you are Harvard-bound.”

“Yes. In fact, I didn’t ever consider any other school. Nice to meet you, Mr. Khanna. Bye.”

“Pam is just like her father. She loves to brag about herself. My son, John is a junior at Harvard. But he is very different; he is very polite, if not saintly. You will like him.”

“Sounds like, he took after you.”

“Dad, let’s go. Mommy is getting upset. She wants you to meet the Senator, now.”

They looked at each other, perhaps for the last time. He thought, angels are forever. She thought, she took his happiness away, forever.

“Please don’t be upset with him. He is just paying for my mistakes…”