Voodoo Dick

(It's dumb.)

A woman walks into an adult store. She tells the guy behind the counter that her husband is going away on business and that she needs something to "entertain" her while he's gone. He reaches under the counter and pulls up a thin box with the words "Voodoo Dick" over the cover.

"Ooh" she says, mouth wide in awe. "How does it work?"

The clerk opens the box and shouts "Voodoo Dick: door!" The dildo flies out of it's box and once it hits the door, does not leave the store but instead starts hitting the door.

"What's it doing?" the woman asks.

"Can't you tell? It's fucking the door!"

"Ooh, I'll take it!"

...

Cruising down the street is a car swerving from side to side mile after mile. A cop pulls the car over. It's a woman in heat and convulsions. How she managed to stop the car was above the cop's paygrade.

"Help me," she pleads. "It's this Voodoo Dick! It won't stop fucking me!"

The cop stares at the woman in her convulsive state. He's seen plenty of things on the road, from addicts, to thieves, to speeding goats. But nothing prepared him for this. He responded with disbelief. Sure it was an addict or some amateur witch...

"Voodoo Dick? My ass-"

fin.