Karma’s Not the Bitch You Are

Karma's a bitch.

It didn't take a genius to realize this–even Kindergarteners realized the reason their parents found out about those cheetos stuffed under their bed was because they pulled Suzie's hair during recess. Of course–Kindergarteners weren't typically aware of the phrase "karma's a bitch" specifically. They probably knew the more kid friendly one–"what goes around comes around."

Technically only the second statement is true, because what goes around does come around, but it's not really Karma that's a bitch. Humans seem to like blaming their faults and flaws on inhuman concepts. You probably do it all the time–have you ever cursed god for stubbing your own toe? Swore to some unknown diety for burning your tongue on too hot of coffee? Insulted some all powerful being that has to be responsible for you getting fired–because obviously it wasn't the stapler wars you were having with Jeremy in accounting instead of working?

Yeah, see? Humans do it all the time, and that's not such a bad thing, except that then people like me have to deal with the real assholes–all those other worldy being you guys seem so set on pissing off.

Karma might be a bitch, but you're only getting the little drops that spill out of the gigantic tub you're creating. Everytime you mutter "I swear to god–" or blame something not-earthly for your own problems, you create a little being that takes all that blame. Except you're human, so nothing you create can take responibility for anything, so instead of just sucking it up it gets insulted that you're blaming the fact that your shoddily trained cat tore up your curtains again on them. The more people who believe in the lie and then blame this new creation, the more mad they get.

Then someone like me gets hired to make sure these guys don't destroy all of human kind. Why aren't we educating people instead of just solving your problems silently and letting it all fester until it ineviably boils over? No idea honestly. In fact publishing this is probably going to get me fired or something, but whatever–it's not like humans believe shit like this anyways.