WHEN THEY RUN.

In my mind I’m still running away but I’m not going anywhere now. What happened? 

You know those dreams where you’re running as fast as you can but no matter what it’s not fast enough? Your body doesn’t do what your mind is telling it to do. Your feet feel encased in cement, you struggle for breath and your blood is roaring in your ears. You wish it was a dream, but it’s not. 

I wish I could wake up but you can’t wake up from real life and this isn’t a dream. That much I do know.

My feet kick and scramble for purchase. Breathing is so painfully labored, it sounds like my throat is shredded and my lungs are about to burst as they search for oxygen. My heart is pounding out of my chest, almost in an attempt to save itself and escape. I reach with my hands, clawing, pulling, desperate, but my movements are lethargic. It’s like the messages from my brain aren’t quite making it to the rest of my body. 

Wide open eyes are trying to pull in light that isn’t there. I don’t know where I am but I know I’m not alone. I try to scream for help but no sound escapes as my muscles constrict in terror. 

Life slows, my mind slows, time slows. I didn’t know the mind could slow time like this. I didn’t know how long a single breath was. I didn’t know how long a single heart beat could actually be or how to measure the space between heart beats. Everything is in fractions of seconds as my mind runs in circles, searching, in an attempt to understand.

The rustling of the leaves is so loud, as though they’re being crunched right next to my eardrum. Is it the icy bite of the wind in my eyes that caused the wetness running down my cheeks or something else? The decay of the forest finds its way to my nose along with the acrid scent of adrenaline. I try to shake my head to rid myself of it but I can’t.

With one last desperate struggle I thrash about, not wanting to add to the decay of this place. Sticks dig into my back as my foot pushes against a rock, but it slips away. My fingernails dig into something smooth, releasing the sharp scent of leather as my mind tries to grasp onto what my body can’t.

Light finally catches my eyes, it’s faint as the clouds drift away from the moon. The edges are black but there is enough light to allow me to focus. Everything falls into place as the last second, the last beat, passes. 

The last thing I see is his face above me as he uses one hand to wipe the tears running down my cheeks. He smiles then tightens his other hand as the light fades into nothing. A faint voice on the wind vibrates through the darkness, his breath on my damp cheek. 

“I love it when they run.”