You Are The Main Character | 1

I'm just going to write something.

I don't know what. Most authors brainstorm a plot beforehand. I don't really have any ideas. Or any characters. That's why I decided you can be the main character.

Now obviously, I don't know you. You might not even be reading this because it looks like some boring book on the Prose like all the other ones. But I want to be different, I'll be honest. I want to be famous, to have even Prose itself be like "That's pretty clever". The idea of you being the main character's pretty fun too.

So let's see...

You wake up. This is rather normal, and rather unfortunate. You're right where you always sleep, just wishing you could pass back out and not wake back up for a few blue moons.

Here's the thing, Main Character. You don't really have a choice, unfortunately. I have a not-plot planned, but you have to be awake and ready to go along with it.

Let's just imagine there's a knock at your door. You get up, you go to the door, tripping over your own feet out of fatigue.

You open it up.

"Who is it?" you ask.

"It," I answer, "is a middle aged man you've never met with a bundle of papers that are apparently especially for you in his hands." Of course, being the dashing, honest author I am, I'm not lying. I just made that up as I typed it.

"Hello," he says, smiling. "I'm selling kittens."

Here's the thing. I don't know what you would normally do in this situation, but then again, this is a typed story. Whatever you would normally do, no offense, does not matter. I am controlling this story. As our parents once said "Just go along for the ride."

You decide to see if his offer is legitimate or not. How you do this, I don't know, but you get bonus points for trying.

You almost ask him where they are, but that's a dumb question, so don't ask it. You ask instead how much he is selling them for.

"$25 each," he exclaims happily.

What a deal, don't you agree. Ah, I don't. How about we raise the price a little. Maybe...

"$50," he exclaims happily.

Whoops. I seemed to have forgot a word. See if you can figure it out... yes, each, that's right. I accidentally made it cheaper, now it's $25 for the whole litter.

I can fix this.

"$5.0 each," he exclaims happ-

No, I hit the wrong key.

"$50 each," he exclaims happily.

You agree this is quite a steal, even though your old deal of 25 for the whole litter was ruined. You settle for things easily, apparently.

You check your money supply. You have... ah, I won't insult you by saying it. Let's just say only one of those kittens will soon be yours, and you can share your drywall diet with it.

You agree to buy one.

"Great," he cheers. He points to a car on the curb. "Just hop in and I'll take you there!"

Readers, this is your choice. Do you want to go, or not? I personally wouldn't, but feel free to leave a comment deciding. Maybe in the next installment, you might actually get a choice.

Until then, you'll be paused staring at his car and thinking very hard about how you're going to raise a kitten.