Used To Be

It's too simple to say "I miss the way things used to be." But it's also too true to not say it. I used to go on adventures. There was an old sewage tunnel that went underneath my high school. I used to love going down there with friends. I used to have a relationship where we tried doing new things all the time. I used to write a lot (now have recently started again, so here I am). I used to enjoy driving, accelerating, taking turns maybe a little too fast. I used to enjoy playing music. I used to enjoy conversations with people that I didn't know.

Things have now changed. I don't know if it is a fact of getting older, but all of these things are gone now. No more adventures. No more new experiences. No more writing (but trying to start again!). No more joy rides. No more music. No more interesting people.

What has changed, other than my age? Sometimes, the drive is still there. Sometimes it isn't. I feel that everything has become too career-focused in this world. I have many coworkers who do their job, and then go home and think about their job, whether that's why they can do better, how much time off they'll get, how much money they make. There are so many other things in the world to focus on.

I miss how easy it was to have these exciting experiences. I am starting to renew my excitement with writing, which I picked up again just today. Hopefully some of these other excitements will come back, and will lead me back to the fun that I used to have before I was worried about if my alarm was set.