Harbinger of Oblivion

I set the cruise control on the 480-million-ton warship and leaned over to get my coffee. Today was a real Monday, and there was all kinds of work to be done, especially in the way of obliterating planets, and I'd need the caffiene to get through it all. I flipped on the comm channel to headquarters.

"Deathwing CX-9887, Apocalypsos, reporting. Have arrived at target location. Over."

"This is HQ, you are approved to proceed with the mission."

"Roger that."

I looked down at the view of Saturnius XI, a lush green planet full of youth and natural beauty. Unfortunately it was swarming with miserable, vulgar rebel filth who refused to pay just respects to His Majesty the Emperor, Holy Mars the God of War. And so the galaxy would be better off without them. I pushed the detonation switch, and took a long swig of coffee while waiting for it to finish. As usual, the planet erupted into billions of fragments, and went shooting across the stars like a big old firework display. Now this was a much more appropriate use of natural resources, considering it followed the will of His Majesty the Emperor, Holy Mars the God of War. Much more appropriate than plotting and sedition.

"Mission completed. Proceeding to next objective."

"Very well Apocalypsos, status updated."

"All glory to the Emperor!"

"All glory to the God of War!"

This the customary ending to all Imperial transmissions; of course we would never tire of speaking such golden words as these! This was our meat and drink, to serve His Majesty the Emperor, Holy Mars the God of War, and nothing else was even a consideration. This was why I pilot Apocalypsos, and this is why I blow up planets all day, dull work though it is.

As I approached the next target, Almetra VII, I looked sadly into my empty coffee cup. I'll have to make more next time, or my life will be destroyed!