Laughs are for the ignorant, atleast that is what I thought

Why did'nt I laugh more? I thought. Why did'nt I cry more? Why did I have to succomb to the feelings of others. Maybe its because I've had a hard life, or maybe thats just my poor excuse. I remember the day I last laughed, it was the day he died. He made me laugh my poor little brother why did he have to die. We were young, I was a depressed fourteen year old, but he was only twelve. We all thought he would pull through. He was the only person who could make me laugh, atleast laugh like I used too. But he's gone and I am soon to follow. I am sure he would have hated the idea of me never laughing again, but what am I supposed to do now without him I have got nothing to laugh about.