Weights

I've falling in and out of love with more people than I have fingers to count. I met this one man that looked like a boy, and he made a fire in my heart, but his hands were terribly cold, so we didn't work out. But for the longest time, I wanted us to. I left home for him, and though we only spent months together it felt like years, and I still have scars from the nightmares we turned into our lives. We would drink whisky and watch the sun rise, we were into that kinda stuff, almost more than we were into each other. We drove around the city like maniacs, getting into any and everything. But things got old real fast. And I couldn't bare to even look at him at one point.  He left me, and I dealt with it. I knew we weren't meant to be. Hope killed me more than anything. But it also kept me alive. A year passed, and then I ran into him at a movie theater. I held my breath at the sight of him, and by the time he walked up to me I was already lightheaded. It felt so wrong pretending we didn't know each other anymore. A lot can change in a year, but we didn't. He asked me how I've been, and he even admitted that I didn't change a bit. He told me about his new job and trade school. It felt like no time had passed between us. He hugged me goodbye, and it's as if I handed him every memory we ever had, because when he walked away, I didn't feel as heavy. So I guess love is the weight that we're all willing to carry for that special someone. But sometimes, the burden is not your honor to bare. I fell in love with someone that did not love me. And it's not the first time. But it does not hurt any less. And if I have learned anything for him, it's that there are people out there, that would rather crush you, than ever love you.