Give Me a Taste of Silence

I’ve always wanted to taste the idle fruit of sweet ignorance. I want to get lost in it, bury my teeth into its flesh and let the sticky juice drip down my neck. At least that way, my thoughts could be silenced, for it is always the people who think the least that are the happiest. Happiness the most simple but evasive emotion. Why must it be so fleeting?

“It is fleeting because it has no space,” I can hear my mother say and perhaps she is right. My mind is too occupied with hate, anxiety, and self-doubt for happiness to take a proper seat. Lucky for me, my demons are usually steadied with good company. In those cases, social awareness takes charge and disciplines before the public sees, but in my solitude, they roam free. They run wild without curfew and I find myself struggling to sleep. I suppose I am lucky because even in isolation, my thoughts still speak to me.