The ultimate sin

"I can sense your hesitation," a low male voice came to me. I sighed softly.

"It's not hesitation," I said, "I just want to enjoy this view for a while."

I took a deep breath. I didn't want to think about what I was about to do. Not yet. Standing on the edge of the cliff, you can easily see the town on the other side of the bay. Even today, despite the evening fog, it was impossible not to notice the distant church tower and the lighthouse.

I closed my eyes and the sea breeze was taking my breath away. From below, I heard the sound of water and the waves crashing against the rocks. I felt a chill that had little to do with the wind.

"You know ..." the man accompanying me began, "Many have tried before you. I would be lying to say that it brought any relief to them.”

I looked at him for the first time. It was hard to determine his age. His face, though marked with wrinkles, did not lose its youthful charm. He had glistening blue eyes in which I could see slight amusement but also sadness. He brushed the graying hair away from his face and sighed:

"Although I must admit that the place is really magical."

"I’ve always came here when it was really bad. I used to close my eyes and pretend that I wasn’t here, that my home was in that darkness overwhelming me and it brought me...", suddenly I broke off, ashamed of my honesty.

The stranger raised his eyebrows and smiled at me encouragingly.

"And it brought a relief", I finished quietly," Because I should not be here. I can not stand it."

There was a moment of silence. The man walked over to the edge of the cliff and looked down. He frowned and quickly moved away from the abyss.

"Why?", he asked. I thought I heard a note of impatience in his voice.

"Because I’m nobody", I answered after a moment of reflection,"I've been crossing this world for over 20 years, and I can count on one hand moments when I was feeling good."

"Wherever I go," I continued, "whatever I do ... It's all for nothing. I still hear that I don’t fit in, that I have no ambition, that I cannot behave, that I talk too much, that I talk too little, that... It's never how it should be”, a single tear rolled down my cheek and I felt that I can't speak anymore.

I felt the stranger's warm hand on my shoulder.

"It's painful," he said. He noticed that I was looking at him and added," Being underrated."

I laughed.

"But it’s not about it at all", I wiped my tears,"I'm not sad, I don't need you to comfort me."

The man looked at me surprised by my rough tone.

"Then what do you need?", He asked uncertainly.

"Revenge."

He opened his mouth as if to say something, but closed it immediately. His face gained understanding.

"I understand," he said after a moment, "Nothing drives us to act like revenge.But think my dear, are you sure you want to follow this path? There is really no return from it, ”he added sadly.

"That's just it, isn't it?", I asked in a shaky voice,"It’s not about my pain, but about theirs."

The man nodded and frowned. It was getting dark.

"Yes, their pain will be great",he confirmed,"I assume that you have already taken care of it ..."

"The letter is on my bed," I replied with vengeful satisfaction.

"You have a nasty character," the stranger said carelessly. I looked at him furiously and he, not caring, continued:

"You are not the first or the last person who's living, oh ... sorry ... I should say dying in order to play back."

I shrugged my shoulders. I was getting tired of his company. The lighthouse on the other side of the bay shone. It was a sign.

"Well, it's probably time for me," I said slowly and turned to the stranger. "You don't have to stay here with me."

"Oh, I'm afraid I have to," he said with a smile.

I looked one last time at the lights of a distant city. I glanced at the stars. I listened to the sound of the waves. I took a step forward thinking of those who I was leaving.

"Are you brave enough?", asked the old man," Or should I ask, is your anger big enough?"

"I just don't see the point," I whispered.

"Of course, it's pretty understandable," he said, nodding.

Next step. I already saw the rocks lurking beneath me.

"Do you think it will hurt?", I asked this question to delay the inevitable.

"Falling doesn't hurt. It's like flying,"said the man,” Only that the destination is defined in advance’

He laughed lightly. Fear swept over me, I couldn’t catch my breath and my heart was pounding.

The last step. I couldn’t see through my tears.

Another one.

And my leg freezes in the air.

I'm flying. I’m leaving them all behind. With the sense of guilt.

Darkness.

"I've been waiting for you here," a voice came from far away. A familiar voice.

The glittering blue eyes turned black. The flames reflecting in them were the last thing I saw.