Her

Meet the new boss. Same as the… nah. The new number two- flips her hair about and smiles. Says hi to everyone and looks at her phone. So fake but what can you do? Someone has to speak up. Go to the boss? He hired her. Whispering among the rank and file. Cliques form. I hate kissing ass. It has always been my downfall. I have a high sense for BS. A friend and colleague sees it too but he is smarter than I am. He says nothing. A stoic who does his job and goes home. I begin to speak. I confront her in a meeting. Next thing I know she makes a cut in my department which pits me against my stoic friend. We know it but it is obvious what she is up too. I talk to her but get nowhere. She talks a lot but says nothing. Blames the move on upper management. Twenty plus years and this lady comes in and in eight months is shaking up my job like never before. I vow to become a monk. I will say nothing. Put my head down, seal my lips, do my job the best can and go home. But it is not my nature. However, I will try. I need guidance. I Google how to become monk-like. Meditate, become quiet, clear the mind… be peaceful. I try and am more or less successful. I rant about her at home to the wife but at work I am quiet. Another colleague asks if something is wrong. Nope. It’s all good- just trying to do my job well, I answer. Three months of this and then… I go to the staff room for a cup of coffee and she has her back to me and is murmuring into her phone. I freeze, not wanting to interrupt but am intrigued by her coquettish tones.

“Of course I will. When? “she breathes.

She realizes I am behind her hangs up and snaps about.

Flustered she says, “Oh hi, what’s up? Just getting some coffee,” and storms past me.

Put it in the bank. Say nothing to nobody. I keep a little notebook stashed in my desk locked. Note the time and date- just in case. My evaluation is due next week. We meet. She says all the nice things but says my communication is lacking and it is marked down on my form. I explain that I have committed to doing my job as well as possible and in doing so I haven’t reached out as much. I have data that shows my growth. She says that that part of my job is to communicate clearly and that I have been lacking and the evaluation will reflect that. I say nothing. I am ready to explode but go into monk-mode and sign and accept my less than stellar yearly evaluation. There are rumors. Someone says they saw her and the boss walking to their cars and lingering a little longer than they should. Then… I stay a little late and as I head to the parking lot there are only three vehicles there. Mine, hers and his. There she is. She doesn’t see me but she veers off a little and tucks something under the windshield wiper of the boss’s truck. I continue, dropping my head so she doesn’t suspect that I saw it.

She is startled and says, “Oh, hey, working late? Oh, OK, uh, see ya tomorrow.”

I nod and get in my car. I pick up my phone and pretend to make a call. She is sitting in her car glancing at me. I continue my fake animated conversation and wait her out. Eventually she pulls away. I get out and taking my phone take a picture of the envelope under the wiper. I quickly take a look. A heart is drawn on the outside, inside is a gift card to a travel site. “Can’t wait” it says with XOXO and another heart on a note. I take pictures of it all and slip it back under the wiper. Something must have happened because a month later he has been reassigned. She is applying for his old position. There is talk among some about how great she would be. I say nothing. I do however check the HR website about when the position will close for applications. A monk does not seek to harm others. I am a temporary monk. I print a picture from my phone from their windshield wiper incident and drop it on her desk when she is away the day before the position closes.