Future Technology

Nero is in grave trouble. Things aren`t going accordingly. He tried everything normal for a Roman emperor, blaming it on minorities, on dogs in the government and setting ablaze half of the city. Without any success! There is only one last option as he walks alone through the dark corridor to the temple of supreme deity – Jupiter. Reluctantly he has somehow urged himself to inquire for salvation. His head is up the wall. Only problem in those days, lack of the devil. Mighty gods of ancient times could be just that - gods, but also a devil, or at least devilish. One can`t be sure what will happen out of his request. What kind of secret obstacle the gods have made on a seemingly flat path? What enigma is hidden in their sweet words? Even the smartest person in the land – the emperor is no match for their duplicity or even threeplicity.

Returning back, Nero wasn`t sure what had happened.

“Choose one future technology. That is the only thing that can save you.”, Jupiter told him, apparently relaxed.

“Pick wisely”, one of the goddesses with snakes instead of her hair smiled at him. Nero turned to god of fire and metalworking, Vulcan. “My stable boy has nicer cloths”, he laughed within himself, but restrained from any comment – this wasn`t his court, he was only a guest over here.

There were many things in front of him, but he wasn`t sure of the purpose for any, except some kind of large musical object. “This is a trap, don`t go there”, Nero is cautious. However, the compulsion is so high, he marched towards it, but just whizzed past it, hearing sighs from some females behind. “Round one to the emperor”.

After that he scrolled up and down until Jupiter said something like:

“Dear Nero, I am expected tomorrow early, at” in half a voice,” some place in Britannia, Bath. We are opening a local spa there”.

The emperor was finishing children`s song in his head “Iny, Tiny, Miny”, and he stopped in front of some little object with a big letter T. Very small with some kind of mirror and letters, together with numbers, but not typical. There was no way back, so he pointed to it. No reaction. That could be a good sign. As he was leaving, he was assured that he had made the right choice and Vulcan together with his team of semi-gods would make necessary arrangements.

“You have to hold out for a month”, Mercury escorted him out, tapping his shoulders. Nero was furious but as time was essential, he had to devise a plan to survive another 20 or so days. Luckily, the calendar was still chaotic and he as emperor could manipulate with it if with nothing else these days. In the meantime, another public spectacle should be arranged. Hopefully, there are some Christians left, lions and other big cats haven`t eaten all of them. If one should ask them, they would prefer change in diet, those Easterners are too thin, but the whole structure of Roman Empire is at stake. To be fair not all, just his valuable neck.

For once, the gods fulfill their promise. Every single person in the whole of land has received small, strange looking thing that could fit in the palm of the hand. The usage is simple as everybody has learnt it very fast. Even slaves, some donkeys and goats, together with females of the opposite sex obtain it with instructions. The Senate has to do it because recent wars, barbaric invasions and famine have decimated population of true Romans. We can add, killing sprees of any ruler since Emperor Sula, against proper citizens. Huge pillars of metal construction were erected around the empire to support new extravaganza.

Literate residents could write messages to one another with ease, but the illiterate could only watch and make some footages. Very soon, these characteristics became extremely popular. Everybody has been taking various recordings and watching them. One poor goat has nibbled its device and subsequently broke it. She is casted out of her flock, forced to wander alone. Even wolves stay clear of her, not putting her out of misery as the poor animal slowly falls in solitude and dementia.

Nero is certain that his countless videos where he shows his musical talents will be “talk of the day”. How wrong he is; the worse the act is, the more followers are there. Soon enough, all businesses and activities are halted as Twitter devices are in each hand 24/7. Many have fallen of the cliffs, not watching the road but some idiotic footage of cat playing with the hank. Others slam their vessels together with precious cargo on to the cliffs picturing their journey, God Neptune was very grateful for offerings whilst their relatives back home shared the disaster among friends and citizens. The disaster of Pompeii brought many to the coast. They were filming it, instead of saving poor victims. At the same time, standing on the shore or high above in the mountains, spectators shared video with the neighbor standing just beside him or her. Folks from Herculaneum, city opposite to Pompeii, turn their twitter apparatuses towards fire balls from the volcano, instantly sending the footages along. Those were very appreciated by all Romans in the whole empire. Many of them couldn’t wait for a similar disaster to happen just around the corner, so they could film it and send it around the globe. Needless to say that both Pompeii and Herculaneum citizens were dead and buried until XX century, although this isn’t sure for their respective twitter accounts. Some were working just fine, without the presence of their masters.

Unbelievable and speedy success of twitter prompted many deities, nymphs, semi-gods to acquire each for them. Under some other or nickname. Jupiter wouldn’t appreciate such activity. The only downside has to be, for them, not to be to play an active role, they could only follow ground humans.

Barbarian tribes stop attacking the frontier after shrewdly concluding that there is foul play with those tiny things in the palm of every Roman.

“Forests and wild plains are more suitable for our children to grow old”, they said on the way back, destroying several of those items rather than using them.

The Senate welcomes success for Twitter in repelling attackers and allows three days’ festivities in recognition for irrevocably getting rid of that pest. Nero is again certain that this is his big opportunity and once again, it ends in tears. More prominent senators tried to avert the public of dangers such devices could become, if used uncontrollably. However nobody has listened for the speakers anymore. They attempt to use Twitter and act like Trojan horse, but adventures of some silly ant mounting apple was more important than state affairs.

Exiled philosopher-poet Seneca Ovidius now has the chance for his voice to be heard once again. He embraces new technology as the means of recovering his career. Again he felt like he was back in beloved Rome instead of god forsaken land of the Istar region. Nevertheless he is very soon shocked as he gets only one follower – Etruria donkey who couldn’t help himself. Definitely a fine moment to drink some Cucuta.

In the evenings, as night shadows conqueror the land, every single person is watching the latest Messalina projects. Legion after legion marches by her bed, as borders are safe and you need to entertain the troopers somehow. Only one not watching is Nero, architect of this novelty.

“This is the worst possible outcome. I am in oblivion during mine term as ruler of this stupid realm. No way one could satisfy the populous”, he is screaming in the empty palace. At the end of his little speech he looks at the device in his hand. “Such small, seemingly fragile and insignificant thing has beaten me”, he smiles at the end but then furiously smashes it on the marble wall. Inquisitive, he approaches, realizing that Twitter is indestructible. Searching for his own feelings, he isn’t sure if he is angry or calm, jovial or gloomy. But one of many statues of former emperors is destined to be destroyed as collateral damage. One piece breaks off, demolishing with its body the device. Nero now knows what he is feeling. Anger beyond anything before, but also he is lost, drowning in cold, dark water. He runs out searching for somebody, demanding to hand him over their twitter. First Praetorian pushes him away. No luck with the rest of them. Outside, on the street, Nero is certain that his fortune is about to change. Again how wrong he is? Basic human nature is million miles from any ruler, but billions from this pathetic one.

He returns to the palace, dirty, hungry, and restless. An idea of a genius, he considers himself to be. He will repair it. Immediately, he realizes that he isn’t even close to such praise.

“Think, Nero, think. What will gods do? Gods, of course”.

He is in the corridor running in a manner he saw Christians do when lions are hot on their heels. In the great hall of the temple he is without any breath, holding high in the air broken piece.

“3 days, 45 minutes, the bet is mine”, Apollo jumps in front of Jupiter throne to claim his award. One look from his father makes him shiver and retreat.

“Dear Nero, to what we owe this honor of seeing you twice in one week?” Jupiter puts his finest face looking down at obese, sweaty emperor. Together with dirty tunic and golden corona hanging on the back of the head, revealing baldness, he is more like a part of some bad video for twitter then, the best among best, the finest among finest, Jupiter representative on Earth.

“This thing…it isn’t working”, with a lot of pauses, he finally replies.

“Can you … can you repair it?”, he asks after a surprisingly long silence. Surprisingly long for him, at least.

More silence. Nero, still dirty, sweaty and obese, but now also very thirsty and more importantly played out by those “masters of puppets”. “Here we go”, he is thinking to himself. Minerva first goes around him – “Can we help him, father” – others follow like he is helpless prey. Jupiter is at his throne, wanting to humiliate him even more. Nero hasn’t got any option but to play this game. He pretends to be disappointed with all of them, but inside he thinks: “What a charade? They are like little children.”

“We could offer you some other future technology”

“That is god idea”

“But which one?”

They all pretend to contemplate for most suitable.

“How long will this proceed”, the emperor is thinking for himself, “ I am really thirsty”.

After another round of vocal “contemplating”, Jupiter comes down and announces to the “surprise” of everybody:

“Space travel. How about space travel? Your subjects can see the Earth like we do it every day. It will be their chance to touch divinity for a day.”

Nero is ecstatic. It is a wonderful plan. Who wouldn’t enjoy sightseeing of stars and constellations and all on expense on somebody else? He apologizes, and quickly corrects himself, he admires such strong leadership and vision.

“Jupiter knows exactly what ordinary people want, when even they lack the knowledge for themselves. This is brilliant. I am going out to bring the best news”, Nero runs back, still thirsty, appreciating the guidance of divine creatures. He nearly blew it. One last problem is how to spread the news. He goes to Rostra, desperately trying to avert some intention. Again very furious, this is a rollercoaster of emotions, he decides to snatch one twitter from some unexpected and hopefully sleepy baby.

At the temple, there are celebrations.

“One way ticket to the universe.” Apollo drinks the ambrosia, happy and jubilant. “We are free of them, at last we have the Earth back for ourselves”, looking behind his shoulder to gagged and bound Prometheus and then to his father where, in his eyes, he can read – I won’t make the same mistake twice.