I’ll never understand women

"What did you notice about me first?"

"My tits or my ass?"

One of the things I most loved about her was the way she would cut deeply to the root of whatever conversation she entered. She did so with ease, and unapologetically.

"Ummm"

I sheepishly stammered...

"Well, to be honest, neither."

I WAS being truthful.

"It was the way your shoulders hunch forward and in as your body slightly crumples over when you laugh. The way when you laugh, HOW you laugh so completely...like you absolutely have to enjoy every last bit of whatever it is that inspires you to laugh, and how you HAVE to make sure you get every last drop of that joy out. It was the sexiest thing I'd ever seen."

She stopped and stared at me. I couldn't tell if she was going to cry, or if I'd been so moved while reliving that moment, that I had actually spoken another language. She never really addressed it.

Two weeks later, I figured it out.

I should have just said her ass.