I Am Home

I'm running through a field of barley, hair blowing in my face, the blue sky swallowing me whole, body and mind. I turn around and the ocean is a raging mess of chaos, waves crashing into one another, bubbles frothing on the edges.  I remember swimming in those waters when we were younger, his arms around me, the way his face crinkled when he smiled. That smile. 

"Come home," he says.

I take a step towards the water. The wind picks up, my skirt airborne like the birds around me. I taste the ocean on my lips, only this time, they are tears. 

"I'm coming," I whisper. 

 Fear swells in my stomach-fear of the unknown. Looking up at the sky I see his eyes, brilliantly blue. I remember his eyes when we first made love, the chills they gave me. I remember his eyes after looking at our son in his arms for the first time, sparkling with love. I remember his eyes when our daughter fell off her bike, his eyes pooling with emotion. Suddenly, I miss him terribly. So I run. 

"I'm coming!" I yell.

I'm running towards the ocean-running to him. Faster and faster-I'm almost there. My old feet fly across the grass, as if they too had always known the way. The ocean roars in anticipation while wind gusts under my heels, pushing me home. The sun beams brilliantly. brighter and brighter- it's so bright, I am blinded.

The water splashes around me, my body slowly becoming weightless. I'm swimming now, small and strong, I submerge myself in her vastness. Then silence. 

I open my eyes and he's there, waiting for me. I run into his arms, and finally, feel the warmth I had been missing the past five years. 

"You made it," he says, gripping me tight against him.

"I'm home," I reply, more to myself than him. I smile into his chest, and am suddenly overcome with laughter. Soon I realize I've soaked his shirt with tears, and hesitantly look up into the blue sky I call his eyes.  

"You're home," he says. The smile I always knew graces his face, and suddenly I am looking at the sun again, dazzled and amazed by his love for me. No, I'm not dead. No-far from it. I am home.