Right person, moderately unfortunate time

I never want to let you go, I’ll never let you go. You’re the right person, so who gives a damn about time? We can make it work, right? If I care and you care, then we’re unstoppable, unbreakable. That’s what I tell myself at night. I must believe that hope isn’t futile. I don’t know any other way to live, any other way to go on.

I dated someone once, when I was young, and we were happy together, or at least, I thought I was at the time. Looking back, I recognize the sorrow that haunted my smiles and the emptiness I felt in my old partner’s embrace. I enjoyed the feeling of being wanted, of being loved. But we felt we were happy, we felt we were right together. We only parted ways due to circumstance, and I hated that, hated the knowledge that there was no one to blame, no one at fault, nothing except for time and place.

In retrospect, they weren’t the right person, not for me. If we truly cared, I think we could’ve made it work, I really do. Long distance relationships hurt, but if they were the “right person” then the pain of living without them would’ve been far worse, far harder to bear.

Now I’m with you, now I think the search is over. Our goals and hopes and dreams align, our interests match, our opinions overlap, our desires are compatible, we get along so nicely. I think we can make it together, I think we care enough to fight the situational discomfort of our current lives. If there’s anyone I’ll fight for, it’s you.

I believe in right person, wrong time, but I don’t think that’s the case for us. Perhaps that’s arrogant naivety, perhaps that’s ignorant pretension. Call me an idiotic optimist, but I’ll always choose hope over fatalistic despair when it comes to our relationship. Besides, the time is only moderately unfortunate, not “wrong” per se. We're adults, albeit younger ones. We're independent, albeit with clinging familial ties. We're pursuing similar careers, albeit in very different fields.

But really, I do have to wonder, is there ever a right time to meet someone? Maybe this is a test for every relationship, so let's study together, shall we? I'll prepare the flashcards if you print the study guide. Or we can just do our best and see what happens.

We share a love for plans, so here’s mine: you’ll be the theoretical physicist and I’ll be the cognitive neuroscientist, we’ll raise a cat together, maybe some kids, and we’ll make it work. Tell me about the universe, show me the stars in the sky—I see those same stars in your eyes when you talk so passionately, so excitedly.

Let’s sing to the songs we love and roll down the window. Let’s drive until we’re sore from physical inaction, let’s hug until we meld together into an unbreakable amalgam, let’s make tacos in the kitchen, let’s watch bad movies, let’s enjoy being together.

You’re the right person, I hope, I know. I know.