So, ya wanna know how to get to Fred Simpson's place, is that right? Well, young fella, it's simple. Just take Main Street south outta town fer about three miles. You'll find yerself riding a road after a bit that is a tad bumpy in places with some up and downs in the road while drivin'. After a bit, you'll come up on a buncha ferns on the left side of the road, that'll tell ya yer headin' in the right direction still.
Keep on drivin' until ya get to the fork in the road, and do me a favor and pick it up cause I dropped it there a few days ago.
Ya keep goin' on and when you see an old white fence on yer right, ya turn onto the next dirt road and that'll take ya to Clem Pickens place. You'll know it sure as I'm breathin' since Clem is the only one there and he's usually fishin' in the pond behind his cabin.
Anyways, when ya get there, just ask Clem where Fred's place is, cause honestly mister, I don't know a Fred Simpson.