settings float around me like
a hallucinogenic kaleidoscope wall -
fragmented psychedelic,
endless buzz.
i hear it all:
“your body is a car”
“your body needs fuel”
“your body must eat.”
I am not this body
let me LEAVE this body
i must transcend this BODY.
let me expunge my humanity
until restriction forces imperfection
to fall from my aching skeleton
like sand in an hourglass.
let me suffocate my anxiety
until it chokes to a sputtered stop
in the blackened crescent of my starved stomach
so i can finally exit this BODY.
let my soul float out of my bones
on feathered wings
until i reach
the most perfect place where i am
bodiless
pure
untouched.
let my fat leave and
my skin shrink and
my bones crush into a powder
that sinks back into soil.
let my BODY return to the earth
let my soul return to the sky
and me return to me.
endless buzz,
fragmented psychedelic,
hallucinogenic kaleidoscope,
i am ready to leave.