Me and my writing

Even in the years that I wasn't writing, I considered myself a writer. People would ask me how I was a writer if I didn't take the time to write. "Its just in my bones," I would explain. I started writing poetry at 8. By 12, I found I could pour my whole being onto the paper. There were no rules, no boundaries. There were only words, silent yet so loud with passion. I found a dance with words. They just seem to flow. 

Outside of my pencil, I struggled. People were hard to talk to. My social anxiety caused me to stutter and lose focus. I could barely keep a conversation. But my pencil and I could sway the masses, draw tears, teach hope or provoke fear. With my pencil, there was no hiding. I could be who I wanted, feel real emotions, have ideas all without judgement. 

Since I have had children, writing has taken a back burner in my life. Its been 6 years since I have writen on more than a doodle pad. Yet all that time, every thought of mine turned into a rhyme, a song, a poetry verse or a random story to play in my head while I fall asleep. My waking moments have been spent dreaming about sitting down finding those words again. How I miss our dance.