Just Your Everyday Existential Crisis

Humans live vicariously. We're just vessels waiting to be filled up, always lusting after something or another, but the thing is, our emptiness is impossible to satiate. Unsatisfied, we poke our noses into each other's business, peering through the windows of the soul to squeeze every last drop of third-person thrill we can. 

....Yeah. I'm talking about you. I can bet you're watching me somehow.  

Look, there's no script for me. No one's feeding me lines behind-the-scenes, telling me to act or talk some way so I can provoke some sort of reaction. There's no right or wrong answer---and that's what kills me. 

....I can see 'em. Timelines stretched out, from the beginning of time and back. And every damn decision I make spawns a million different parallel universes. 

Say I go out to buy chocolate ice cream. Since I bought the last portion of chocolate ice cream, the shop has run out of that flavor. But then the President comes walking in, demanding for a chocolate ice cream cone. Because there's no chocolate ice cream left, the President's in a bad mood, which means they go ahead and botch a diplomatic deal with another country. That then leads to rising tensions, a world war being declared, and then the apocalypse.

....Now, if I'd just bought vanilla ice cream, everything would go differently.

Hypothetically.  

...To hell with hypotheticals. There's chain reactions going off in my head every day; anxiety-inducing Big Bangs, universes exploding into existence every time I so much as take another breath.

I know. I know you're out there. You can see all the timelines too. You can see what I should've, could've, ought to have damn done. And you look down on me for not having the foresight to produce the best outcome. 

Good thing you're not living out my reality---otherwise, you'd be flailing around as much as I am. 

Nah. I'm just a plot device, a character foil, background noise to you. Just like how you know what's best for others until you're the one suffering the consequences.

....Fun, isn't it? Go on.

 Laugh.