Pen to the Paper 22

"NICK!"

"Yeah, what's up, Caleb?"

"Why have the food prices gone up?"

"Uhm… inflation?"

I gave Nick a look. "Not that, dumbo. Have you checked the menu?"

"Oh! That! Yeah, it's pride month, man," Nick said with a shrug.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

Nick disappeared into the concession stand and came out with a bag of rainbow colored popcorn. "This is all that was in stock. Businesses like to use the fact that people are gay to make extra money, so they just didn't stock up on everything properly. So, this month, every concession stand is selling pride themed snacks and beverages."

"Oh. Well, is there any way we can bring the prices down?"

"I mean, if you want to lose money this time around."

I waved my hand dismissively. "If I cared about the money, Nick, I wouldn't be selling everything for less than a dollar. Well, most things. Besides, that check from Buccee’s when I sold out should cover that."

"Cool, cool. Now, walk with me. We have to get you to the dressing room and into the suit I had specially ordered for tonight."

I nodded my head and followed Nick to the dressing room. When we arrived, he pointed to a bag on the back wall. Unzipping it, I said aloud, "Oh, you've gotta be kidding."

I turned to see Nick beaming ear to ear. "Wait until Willow sees this…"

*****

Rainbow lights flashed across the stage. Smoke bombs, also rainbow, burst through the air. In the middle of it all, I stepped out and looked at everyone who was drinking their rainbow slushies, eating their rainbow popcorn, and throwing around Skittles, which were gray for some reason. Seems like they could have just smacked "Pride" on the box, maybe put a flag on there, and called it a day. But, I suppose it's pretty cool. And the symbolism is a nice touch.

Everyone started cheering when they saw me. I was wearing a rainbow suit—a full suit with a vest and everything—with a rainbow bow tie and rainbow fingernails. Willow, the accountant, painted them before I put the suit on. Everyone started screaming louder when the screen lit up behind me.

Turning around, my jaw dropped. It was an animation of a closet door opening. Then big words popped up on screen with arrows pointing at me. The screen, in bold font, said "GAY." Fireworks exploded throughout the arena.

"No, no, no, no!" I called out. "I'm not gay! I swear!"

The crowd started chanting, "COME OUT! COME OUT! COME OUT! GAY! GAY! GAY!"

"Pen to the Paper is out, guys!" I said, then darted out of the arena, through the corridors, and down into the dressing room.

Inside, Willow and Nick were rolling on the floor laughing.

"NOT funny!" I said furiously.

"You're… right!" Nick said between laughs. "It was… hilarious!"