fear bled neon green that day

it was the kind of chill that seeped into your toes, quickly moving to your heart. hot chocolate flowed, but so did the tears. laughter that became gasps of tragedy and terror. the air held anxious anticipation.

i'm not sure if i could pinpoint the moment i realized that something was wrong. maybe it was the running, or the wide eyes as the news spread. maybe it was the first time i heard what was happening. maybe it was when she started to cry. green pirouettes-turned-sobs became the single thought that ran rampant through my head and i couldn't stop thinking about how people could comment on the weather, on the hot chocolate, on well wasn't the bus driver just amazing? maybe it was warm. maybe it was good. maybe he was amazing. but you're missing the entire fucking point. someone's life has just been impacted. this was her everything, and now she will be forced to live in a world that won't accept her dreams, her aspirations. you can be positive all you want, but wait until you're the one who got run over by a brakeless truck and you'll realize that positivity is entirely unwanted. wait until you've woken up in a hospital and been told that your lifeblood has been stolen from you in one moment of brake failure.

no, positivity had no place on this day.

she deserved more than this.

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https://abc7.com/raleigh-nc-christmas-parade-2022-accident-truck-crash/124718717/