how to cry

author's note:

my father used to say

that the most important lesson

is learning how to fall

and how to get back up

I'd like to modify this lesson

into one I taught myself

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take a deep breath and stand. take the hall pass and head out the door as if nothing is wrong. avoid the teacher's eyes. if it's in the middle of a lesson he will be sure to give you a look, but pretend you don't notice.

go to the nearest bathroom. look for feet under the stalls. go into the one farthest from any occupied. lock the door. sit down and let go.

do not rub your eyes or worry about your makeup. touching your face will make everything worse. let everything flow and worry about it all later. don't worry about anyone else in the stalls, they don't have to know who you are. cry as long as you have to.

wait until the bathroom is empty to exit the stall. asses the damage.

soak a paper towel with cold water and press to your eyes. do not rub or scrub, only dab. reapply makeup of you had the foresight to bring it with you. if you have contacts and also carry glasses, wear your glasses, they hide almost everything, plus you can say that your eyes were red because there was a scratch in your contact.

take a deep breath. head back to class. sit down and make some excuse about your dumb contacts or allergies or anything, really. they will believe you.

hold it together and try to pay attention. chances are your teacher is already mad, no need to make your day any worse