Chapter 3: Do You... Promise?

As promised Peck treated me to my choice of sweets from Deb's Delights.

The owner was actually named Alec. Though his grammy Deb had taught him the ins and outs of candy making.

For twenty minutes I tried to decide between the cheapest candies. All the while thinking of times Peck had swiped pieces of heart and hard work. Sure, more often than not they had ended up as gestures for Dad but I still felt sick at keeping that secret.

"I'm just not feeling it today," I told Peck.

Leaving the shop he asked me, "what's wrong bro?"

I tried to get him to drop it knowing he wouldn't understand.

"Come on Jimmy that's what I'm here for," Peck insisted.

"I know but really it's nothing," Jimmy said. 'Nothing you won't try to muddle,' he added in his head.

"If you can't share with me then who can you share with?" he asked. "I know keeping secrets feels bad but at least we've gotten closer. At least... I had hoped."

"Fine, there's no winning with you," I muttered bitterly.

Peck gave me his full attention. "How is this so easy for you?" I asked not looking Peck in the eyes.

"Oh this again," he realized. "I told you we do a not right thing for a selfless reason that's--"

"Karmically neutral," we both said.

"So," I started fidgeting a bit, "you don't like it?"

It was unsettling to watch him think about it. "Gives me a rush but, nah, I wouldn't be in this long term," he said to my relief.

"Great. When can we stop?" I asked.

"Again I've told you when Dad gets better," he reminded me.

Dad would be home one day. We all wanted to believe that. We needed to. Even when my Father was so drugged he could barely acknowledge his sons.

To me he got paler every visit. We left the hospital in pretty low spirits. Mom still dabbed her eyes.