Prologue: As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a lawyer…

What follows is a collection of some of the cases I have been asked to handle, combined with my own personal comments and opinions. Naturally the names, dates, and certain information, have been changed to protect the innocent… or is it the guilty? After all the innocents don’t really need protecting. If you detect a slight hint of sarcasm that is because it is there. We didn’t have the money for therapy, and I am told by those who chose to love me that I am not allowed to develop a drinking problem. Hence, you may have to suffer the odd sarcastic comment. In doing so, please remember that while you suffer a comment, I had to actually put up with these people in real life, after having spent years becoming a qualified lawyer. The cases you will hear are all real, much to the bewilderment of onlookers; however, creative license has been taken for literary effect, and, you know, to avoid giving them grounds to sue me. Without further procrastination, I hope you enjoy where once I endured terrible pain.