Flying Bugs are a Myth

Tables are truly humanity's greatest achievement.

I admire the rich oak of my dining table, marveling over its polish. The kitchen table's painted mahogany shines with great luster, shimmering under the spotlight it deserves.

The ground is blessed to host the legs of so many of such divine creations. For every wooden, plastic, metal leg that graces the floor, the earth is blessed with three lifetimes of blessings. Luck and karma are but trivial blessings for the tables to grant.

Tables are the sole recipient of my eternal worship. There exist many a reason, from their stunning structure to the masterpiece that is their utility.

But more important than any other reason, however, is their capability to lift.

Bugs and spiders crawl their way across the floors, dirtying them with their abhorrent appearance. Each movement they make curses the gift from the divine, daring to spit on the grace the gods have given us.

But tables keep their influence from spreading, and allow human hands to touch uncontaminated possessions.

Oh tables, how absolutely stunning you are...