First Kiss

Keegan

Blue is staring at my mouth.

It's been a few moments since I said I wanted to hear his story. We're still on the roof, and the words seem to have died between us.

The silence is awkward, but also kind of erotic.

Blue's gaze brushes my lips; his mouth falls open. I'm sure he's about to kiss me. No denying the thought leaves me breathless.

I need a distraction.

"Hey," I quip, "you should sing at the house parties instead of that guy you said was a douche." I'd remembered his comment earlier about the band, and it was the first thing I thought of to say. Even though I don't want to encourage more partying, I do want to hear Blue play.

After looking confused for a second, Blue grins at my random suggestion.

It's hard to describe the way it makes me feel; but it is definitely a good feeling.

Blue doesn't respond right away. Instead, before I even know what's happening, he slowly drags his thumb across my lower lip. It's a quick gesture, but it turns me on. I might even have moaned.

Did the sound come out of my mouth? Or did I just hear it in my head?

Blue leans toward me, and I'm sure he's about to kiss me. My eyes flutter closed in anticipation.

And then he chuckles. My eyes fly open.

"I was talking about myself," he says with a smirk. "I'm the douche. It was my band playing last night."

"Oh." I've barely gotten the word out when he kisses me. It's tender and exquisite, and I want more. Well, part of me does, anyway.

But that's not how I react.

I pull back and twist my head away, then slap my hands on my thighs in a gesture of dismissal.

I'm irritated by how much I want to follow the kissing wherever it might lead. I mean,

I just met the guy. What on earth am I thinking?

And really, Blue is out of line. Why did he assume he could kiss me? I should be mad at him. I am mad at him. Sort of.

I'm for sure mad at myself.

"Okay, well," I sputter, "that's not...this is not what I'm here for."

I pause, feeling my face get hot, knowing I sound like a fool.

"I have to be at the newspaper early tomorrow, so..."

Blue doesn't move, just sits there with his hands draped over his guitar, staring at me with an indecipherable expression on his face.

"Newspaper?" he finally responds with a squeak in his voice.

"I'm trying to get a reporter job at The Daily."

He gives me a blank look.

"The campus newspaper," I add.

"I didn't know we even had a campus paper."

"Re...really?" I'm sputtering again. "Ikana's journalism program is known all over the country, and you didn't know we had a newspaper? It's only one of the top college newspapers in the U.S. You mean you never read it?"

I've been a news junkie ever since I can remember. People who don't keep up with the news always amaze me.

I'm stunned that Blue doesn't know Ikana College has a newspaper. As stunned, I guess, as he was that I didn't know about Frasier Bryson.

He puts his hands up in mocking self-defense. "No need to get upset over it, roomie."

He looks away, barking out a short, harsh laugh. "I try to avoid the news. I don't want to know what's going on in the world anymore."

For a moment, I try to process the pain in his voice. Then I decide this conversation's gone as far as it should.

"Well," I say crisply, picking up my phone and journal and inching my way to the window, "I need to finish setting up my room so..."

"You're a journalism major?" Blue asks, as if I'm not obviously trying to leave the scene. "And a freshman?"

I've almost reached the window, but I pause and turn back to him.

"Yeah."

Then, for no good reason, I keep talking.

"I waited 'til the last minute to accept a spot at Ikana, and all the reporter slots at the paper were taken. I know I can do a great job though. I was the editor of my high school newspaper. For a long time, I've wanted to be a journalist. For as long as I can remember. So I'm going to show up in the morning and try to convince the editor to hire me."

I'm babbling, and I can't help blushing. My strategy—if you can call it that—sounds so lame and childish when I hear it out loud.

And of course, I've left out the part about using my family connections to snare a spot on the paper.

For months, I've promised myself I would not do that. I got into Ikana without my family's help, and I wanted to get the newspaper job the same way.

Virginia wanted me to go to the University of Oklahoma. She even tried to force me go there.

But for once, I stood my ground, and in the end, she still offered to pay for me to come to Ikana. And of course I accepted. It's not like my dad could pay for it. It's not like I could have made it here any other way.

My principles apparently only go so far when it's something I really want, which I guess makes me not that much different from Virginia.

I shake my head, trying to clear the troublesome thought. I'm still blushing.

"That's cool," Blue says, his face splitting into another appealing grin. "Good luck."

"Thanks." I slide my feet through the open window just as the wind blows the curtains into my face.

"Um, Keegan?" Blue asks. "Is it okay if I go through your room? Or do I have to go down the way I came up?"

I shove the curtains out of my way and look at the bed I haven't even slept in yet.

It's sitting there, still smelling of the disinfectant I sprayed all over it this afternoon before making it up.

Blue has already kissed me. Put that with my physical reaction to him and the bed right there as an invitation, and it could be dangerous.

Maybe dangerous is just what I need.

I so can't believe I'm even thinking that.

"Don't worry." Blue sounds like he's about to burst out laughing. He can probably tell there's a war going on in my silly head.

"I'm going right out the door. You're perfectly safe."

I feel myself blushing. Again. "Of course you can go through my room." I try to sound unconcerned, carefree; I fail.

Blue follows me through the window, then heads to the door, turning just before he leaves the room.

"Goodnight, Keegan," he says softly. "And, um, sorry about the kiss. I thought—"

He shakes his head with a rueful smile. "Never mind what I thought. I was out of line, and I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

"Goodnight, Blue." I sit on the bed, frustrated at how disappointed I feel that he's pledged not to kiss me again. Seriously, what is wrong with me?

"Hey, Blue?"

The door is almost closed. He sticks his head back inside. "Yeah?"

"Would you sing that song again to me sometime?" Why on earth did I ask him that?

He pauses for a moment as an impish smile lights up his amazing eyes, and again, I'm tingling all over.

"Count on it."