Can you feel it?

It’s in between your sighs, it’s right there, before your heel presses down on that carpeted floorboard you know will creak, it’s the five am aftermath of cats outside yowling and the foxes fucking and the bins crashing and your neighbour’s flashlight through your curtains— at least you hope that was your neighbour’s. There! it’s in the click of spit breaking between your teeth and lips, every thought ringing true right before you forget. when what you’re waiting for surrounds you like a ticking you can’t hear, that quiet before you dive into a chlorinated pool, when stillness becomes just a high pitched whirring, it’s that empty space on your chest where someone you love once pressed — are you dizzy with it yet? Here, listen, let it pull you closer in and —-shush, you.

It’s all those needless fears, anxieties borrowed from the future, it’s the upside down hopes and dreams, it’s all the things you never said. you never needed to, anyway.