Karma

It's hard to say the words you want me to say. You stand there in silence hoping that the words you seek would spring forth like the Autumn glow and bring you comfort and peace, but my comfort and peace is hidden in the darkness from which you stored it.

You didn't care about my pain, my screams in this lonely box you placed me in. You laughed and teased and reminded me of your greatness while I find sanity in my anxiety. You didn't wonder if your words would kill me or leave me paralyzed. Yet, I've bleed on the floor, broken, and ripped apart. My scares defines me but we both know that was not my true self just what I have become.

You want forgiveness?

I wanted freedom.

You want to forget the past,

I wanted to explore my future.

Now we are here and you ask me to forgive you. For such a long time I have tried to replace everything like a movie in my head. Trying to figure out what I did to upset you. Why me? I asked and got no response and for years I have tried to walk amongst people with no faces cause I am too afraid to open my eyes and see. I want to run I want to hide. I want to take the knife you placed in my back and slit my throat with it. Finish the job you didn't have the balls to do. Depression was a gift from your hate. You want me to forgive.

Karma, has devoured your soul. It's feels overwhelming and terrifying, but it's well deserved cause now you get to sit and the lonely box of darkness decorated with madness. You get to bleed on the floor, broken and ripped. You get to see the faceless people that point and stare. You get to scream in the echo of silence.

Dinner is at eight with fear and regret we shall not be late but before I forget...I forgive you.