Challenge
Write the absolute worst opening paragraph of a cheap detective novel.
The Effective Detective
It was hard to concentrate on what she was saying. Crying and talking a mile a minute, she was the only witness I had. But I was fixated on the thread of cashmere lint that was stuck to the peachy pink lipstick glopped all over her lips. Ample lips. Ample, quivering lips and lint from a cashmere sweater that was two sizes too small. No doubt about it. This dame was gonna cause me some agida.
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