Sister, Stranger, Mother
Beautiful mother,
You're sitting alone with eyes straight ahead
Facing your judgement
Decided by the man in front of you
Brought down by the man to your left
While the people at your back
Look on with ferocious attention
I see your ankles crossed demurely
Your neutral, taupe slacks
The collared shirt you wear is tasteful
You hair in a bun at your nape,
Even your hair must be primly contained
You did it, sweet momma,
You're attractive, without being sexy
I see your white knuckles
I know what they mean
You're gripping that ballpoint pen
Like a life preserver
For you, maybe it is
You got the look, baby, you're on point
Only your fingernails give you away
I can see they've been chewed
Down to the quick
Your nails are cracked, peeling stubs
Allegations are thrown like confetti
Accusations thrown like grenades
The man to your left is calm and cool
And collected
He's firing missiles like he's the USS Missouri
I see you catch those missiles one by one
You're juggling like it's your job
While the man in front of you condemns
While the people behind look on
That smooth demeanor exploits
He's broken no laws, followed all the orders
He attends church every Sunday!
With quiet conviction
He presents himself safe
He presents himself trustworthy
"Concern" & "well being" are words he twists
He's read the book, he knows the right phrases
His manipulations are gross and untrue
But you stutter when you try to explain
You shake and tremble, you've been triggered
He attacks you in open court
with his most powerful weapon
with your children
And you cry and shake and quake
And lose
I see the moment your poise is snapped
The leash barely holding your emotions
pulled taut, you're trying to rein on in
I feel you, Momma, I see the tenuous hold
And the man in front of you judges on
While the man to your left keeps on firing
And the people behind you are witnesses
To the death of your soul
Look only at me, lovely Mother
The self righteous have marked you unworthy
In my eyes, there is no damnation
In my eyes, you'll find commiseration
I know how you feel
How it hurts
How it burns
How it slices & dices & kills you
Hold your head up high
Give these bitches nothing to say
When the news spreads like fire
You lost custody of your babies
It's a cruel, unfair world
Mothers are held to a higher standard
Women are held to a stricter moral code
I know all about it, Momma don't cry
Don't reinforce the claims of your crazy
Go on home now, little Momma
Curl up in a corner and lick your wounds
Cry and rage and scream and break shit
Try not to kill yourself
Even though it would be such relief
Then tomorrow,
the sunrise brings a new day
A new start, a fresh chance
Time to begin prepping
For the next battle.
You're not alone, little Momma
There's more of us than I ever dreamed
Battered by our husbands
Alienated from our children
Family court kicks us
Again and again
You're brave, Momma, you're strong
You fall down during every round
You're up to round 112
But when that bell rings,
You're coming in hot
Momma, you're coming in swinging
I see it,
I know it
I feel you,
I am you
I'm on round 209.
Today, I'm also coming out swinging.
Thank you sweet Momma
For regarding me with empathy
With compassion, with mercy
When it's my turn to be judged
When my fate is decided for me
You must've seen the way that I tremble
You're a stranger, but I know your story
You're my sister, not of blood but trauma
You're a mother,
no manipulation can ever change that
I see you Momma,
you're no longer alone