I have that pinup girl

tattoo

the one that reminds me of

you

I want to shovel her mouth so full of shit

she can't breathe

slinking on my skin

like you

I forget she's there

memories mean nothing

when you're trying to forget

ink stains your skin

this shit goes layers deep

I'm a watercolor swirl

don't come inside my world

we're all mad

Here.

I was never a man who believed in any rumors. Nor have I ever been jealous of my lovers. Because, I had the heart of a lion, yet soft and tender. When I loved, I loved abundantly. When I trusted, I did it wholly. But along the way, someone once told me, “When your promise gets shattered into tiny pieces, and your heart is left in complete disarray, and in the coldness beyond repair, you’ll have a different perspective about life.”

But today, I regret for being blind all these years.

I stood outside, trying to control my anger, my fury rage, as I watched the only woman who stole my heart but now wrapped in the arms of a stranger. They sat by the bar, laughing, joined in body and soul; and their hands intertwined around each other, just like how she and I used to do. They seemed lost in their own fantasy world, paying no attention to whom their actions could badly hurt.

I saw her soft, warm fingers following his palms and his face, as his fingers were also lingering over her lips, the same way I used to brush her lips, looking into her euphoric eyes. She appeared happy and free. That even made me sick and crazy. How could she do this to me? What have I done to her, other than loving her more than my life?

I thought I was her pillar, her one true love forever, the only shoulders she’d cry on.

I felt her sudden betrayal in my bones.

I watched them in my intense and raging eyes, as they swirled in each other’s arms. I saw her glittering happiness. I wanted to barge in and make a mess. But, what could’ve I said to her? Why you loved another man? Why did you find happiness? I felt my head split into two, thinking about it. I left the one woman I adored, cuddling in the arms of a stranger, and quailed into the dark night. I never looked back.

The next morning, I saw an early rising bright sun, and a reason to live, as I inhaled the fresh air.