Me

For a time I believed in all things cookie cutter and pre-conceived;

Making plans and staying on the straight and narrow,

I absorbed their ideology, was molded by the church,

Became the man that fought with the grain rather than against it,

I loved a nation that was forever tinted by nostalgia and a King James mentality,

But eventually I grew up, as some people choose to do,

A poor decision for anyone looking for the happiest route to the pyre,

I developed a kindness that my family would be ashamed of,

I fell in with society’s vagrants and was quick to call them family,

I learned fast to love hard and take no apologies,

I found that regrets were wasted time in a story that needs no transcription,

I gambled a bit, lost a lot, and never stopped to thank my liver,

I stood up for what I knew was right and fought even harder for what I thought to be right.

I barely broke even, and for a while I just survived.

Now I may not pray for suburbia these days,

Hell, I may not pray at all,

But I still chase morality and value the few that became closer than blood,

I still ache for a destination I’ve never known, even while doubting the idea that we’re ever meant to settle,

Truth be told, I find the journey far more poetic than any pre-packaged American dream,

And the madness along the way is by far the one thing I believe in most,

I may never have meant to be this person, but sculpting a life out of regurgitated theology and good intentions was someone else’s dream to begin with,

A bullet I’m glad to have dodged.