I had no idea where I was heading, nor did I really give a shit for that matter. All I could remember was buying a one way ticket from some asshole attendant that charged me a thirty dollar "inconvience fee" simply because I ruined his nap; whatever, I needed a way out.

I can't help but shake this annoying feeling, like there's a colony of ants just beneath my skin trying to turn my arms into a microscopic subway system; been like this for a couple weeks now, ever since I won that writing contest with a three page clusterfuck of Jack Daniels, Gillette and bills coming in hotter than an aesteroid the size of Texas.

And what did I get in exchange for this award winning piece, you ask? A pat on the back, a thousand unempathetic smiles, and a hefty amount of exposure. Gee, thanks; that'll stop life from mentally castrating me every second of the day.

Could you say I'm running from my problems? That's all you. Does that mean you can call me a coward? Again, that's all you. To me? I don't really see it either way. As a matter of fact, I find myself having trouble seeing much of anything these days.

To be honest, I couldn't even begin to tell you why I started writing; was it because I loved telling stories? Or was it because I was too damn scared of being unemployed? I guess it doesn't matter either way, not like I've made a single cent off this "profession". The only things I've learned thus far from doing this are the following:

- Everyone will say they "love your work and hope to see more" yet will never donate a single cent to your dreams.

- You can count on having shitty vision by age thirty-five with the amount of time you spend staring at a damn computer screen

And probably most important:

- The internet doesn't give two shits unless you're some sorta visual artist.

It's these three simple sentences that plague the place I thought was "home" but turned out to be nothing more than a malicious vacuum sucking out all the creative energy in my soul with each passing day and every swipe of the credit card.

It's these three simple sentences that are the reason I'm on this shithole train towards an unknown destination; but it's all about the journey right? Well for the starving writer, that "journey" is more like crawling through a minefield that's uphill in the middle of a fucking blizzard.

It's taken me half a decade, three shitty break ups, six hundred and fourty three different songs, and nonexistant God knows how many arguments with my parents to finally realize something I probably should have realized a helluva lot sooner than I did:

Though it's hella easily to see it, yet hella hard to believe it; you gotta just be honest with yourself sometimes and run away from the mundane song and dance you've been doing for practically the entirity of your adult life.

That's why I'm on this train to somewhere; with nothing but the clothes on my back and my MP3 player.

Get me the fuck outta here.

I know that there's an open door out there somewhere.

Just hope I can find it before I can no longer fake a smile.

Seattle? Toronto? Austin?

I really don't care.

Take Me Anywhere.

All his life he had been told to be a good boy and keep his head down in the scripture, ancient words allegedly derived from the birther of all creation; that if he simply did everything he was told, that he would be rewarded with the most divine of vacations. He had been promised knowledge and guidance in the words that were present on the pages before him, words at his young age he was too naive to understand; nevertheless, he obeyed, because mommy and daddy know best; just have faith.

Then one day, the little boy had grown up and found himself starting high school; fear over the new unknown had consumed him to the point of almost ditching his first day, but once again he had been reassured that everything would be fine, so long as he obeyed the script he had studied since childhood. The young man was now revitalized with courage, the fear that had once enthralled him now nonexistant; his head firmly on his shoulders, the young man set off for his exciting first day of high school for he simply had faith.

His home away from home, the church, was for all intents and purposes his candy store; at least, that had been the very notions his parents had been telling him. It was here that he found more indivudials to call friends and family, all of them just like mom and dad in both spirit and wisdom. "Such a good young man." they told him "Paradise awaits you one day.". The boy truly believed every word, that he could do no long so long as he had faith.

Everything had been going according to plan, the young man finding great success in his studies with not a single issue with his folks at home; it was all thanks to the script he knew at this point like the back of his hand. One day, however, mere moments after arriving at school, the young man bore witness to two young women holding hands down the hallway; the young man found himself perplexed by this observation, for it went against everything that the words on the page had told him to uphold. "Fear not." his beloved parents assured him, "they won't be rewarded with the vacation you long for."

In time, the young man would find himself as a college freshman, where he eagerly began to enroll in several classes in the field of science. It was here that his professors, men and women who's life experience combined tripled that of him and his parents, bestowed upon him the truth of the universe, though it was not the truth he had been waiting for. "There was no creator" they told him, "Are life is meaningless in the grand scale of the universe.". Needless to say, the young man, still struggling to find his own path while staying true to the wisdom of his family both at home and at church, began to question everything. His parents, worried now that their beloved son would lose his one way ticket to eternal paradise, sternly reminded him of the script he had been handed at such a young age; but the young man, try as he might, could not help but riddle his family and friends with a neverending barrage of "why?"s; he hadn't had faith.

Soon enough, he was now simply a man, ready to face the world and all its hardships thanks to the neverending wisdom of his family and friends; but the man couldn't bring it upon himself to listen to it any further, he deduced it was time for him to live life the way his heart told him to live for the heart can never truly lie. It was not long after that he took the full plundge into the unknown and begun to live his life by his own creed; he didn't use his faith.

Many years later, the now elderly man found himself on his death bed, mind happily wandering back in time through all the memories he had made over the decades; the men he had kissed, his beloved children who were by his side until the very end, even his parents who had disavowed him years prior came to mind. When the time had past and he drew his final breath, the man found nothing waiting for him on the other side, he had realized the answer to the biggest question he had his entire life; faith was nothing but lies, his hypothesis finally proven to be correct.

            There once was five little dots; Dot, Dotty, Dottette, DotDot, and Steve. On a peculiar Saturday morning, the five little dots went outside to play but soon discovered that their land had perished. The grass was brown, the trees all fallen down. Remnants of fire lurked everywhere and the little dots, all except Steve, had not idea what to do.

            "We have to move forward." Steve proclaimed.

            "But where, and how?" the other little dots inquired.

            "To the west, and on a raft." the self-voted leader replied.

            With a quick hurrah and five hours well spent, the little dots soon had a raft fit to sail the seven seas. As high fives were exchanged and smiles found all around, the little dots all gathered atop the sturdy raft. With a mighty push and a complying wind, the little dots soon found themselves sailing steadfast on a hope-filled journey to the west.

            Seven days had soon passed, and the little dots had felt that they would be scot free. This was proven wrong soon after however, as the raft they called shelter began to rattle and sunder.

            "This is it!" Dotty cried

            "We're set to die!" screamed DotDot.

            With fear struck in their eyes, the four other dots all turned to brave Steve, desperately seeking what to do next. Laughing and boasting, Steve showed no fear, taunting the waves knowing they would be saved.

            A tidal wave struck, causing the raft to crumble and sink. The poor little dots began getting swallowed beneath the horrifying waves. Now one might wonder, why not swim? That's because they are dots, who lack human limbs.

            Water weighed them down, and they soon found themselves plummeting into the ocean's depths.

            "It's all over!" They thought to themselves, fear stricken and cold they had come to accept their fate.

            Ocean sand pressed against their backs soon enough, and when their eyes had opened, what was to be seen? Why an oasis, so simple and clean. Running forth towards their new found home, they hollered and cheered.

"Perhaps it was not west that was best, but south where smiles strike our mouths." Steve remarked.

C’mon... jus’ a few more stitches.

“Af’er te’ beast boys!” her father’s voice roared throughout the dense forest, accompanied by a hellish symphony of war horses and swords clanging with each gallop; blue irises darting back and forth from the tapestry to the rapidly brightening sky; it was ever clear that she was running out of time.

North of her, she could hear the mighty growl of a grizzly bear fleeing from the murderous rampage that was quickly gaining on them; the sensory overload that was bombarding her proved to make the current task of stitching the torn tapestry of her mother rather difficult, but she was ever determined to change her fate.

“Faster! C’mon!” the red haired archer demanded of her steed, who would promptly obey by galloping at the fastest speed it could muster; the young princess could only pray to the gods of old she would make it in time.

Thread would find itself mending the fabric at a much more accerlated rate now, the archer’s full attention glued to the task at hand so much so that she failed to pay attention to where she had been riding; with a startled scream, she and the tapestry would be ejected from the horse, her body coming to a crashing halt on the outskirts of the familiar clearing encircled by stone pillars. In the center, she would lay eyes upon the grizzly she had only heard moments ago, the creature in a clear hostile state as it looked for a way out of its current predicament.

The sun had nearly risen by now, and it would not be much longer until all the hard work the princess had put into lifting the witches’ spell was all for naught; all around her, she could hear the war party draw close to signal that they would arrive here any moment now. She struggled to rise to her feet, several groans of immense pain escaping her as it become quite clear she had broken at least a few bones in her body; fueled purely by adrenaline, the princess slowly limped her way over to the creature, her dead arm dragging the tapestry behind her.

Jus’ a lil’ farther...

As she drew closer, blue irises would meet the black ones belonged to the bear, sending the creature into a less hostile state; a few more hobbles would see her finally come face to face with the grizzly bear, the archer using the very last ounce of her strength to drape the creature in the tapestry.

“We did it mum’!” the princess would exclaim with joy, pulling the beast into a hug as the now fully risen sun began to slowly warm her skin.

One moment would pass, followed by another, it was growing quite clear that something wasn’t right; the red head would flutter her teary eyes open to realize the misfortune that had befallen her. At the very bottom of the tapestry tear lay a gap that would have been drawn shut with a single stitch of the thread; she had failed to mend the bond that had been torn by pride.

“M-mum...?” fear consumed her voice, eyes gazing up toward the face of the beast that was once her mother.

She was met with a deafening roar, followed swiftly after by a shove to the mossy ground beneath her.

“Merida!” a voice screamed out, clearly belonging to her father who was rushing to the scene with his longsword drawn.

Her eyes would turn back to the grizzly above her, the last thing her sight registering being a massive claw swinging downward towards her.

I jus’ wanted te’ change my fate...

Coldness of tears began to paint her cheeks.

Followed by a warmth flowing out and around her throat.

Finally, there was nothing left but silent darkness.