In the beautiful words of John Marcus:

“Sometimes words are a little too hard to catch. They flit and flutter all over the place almost impossible to catch, taunting and teasing me with the worlds I could create.”

And the last part caught my attention, upon reading it. “…taunting and teasing me with the worlds I could create.” Cause I've written a novel, and currently I'm writing its sequel, and I essentially created a whole world. A whole global history, a whole global culture, a whole everything on a global scale. George Lucas, that literal genius, created a whole galaxy, far, far away, along with Martin Goodman creating a whole universe, Gene Roddenberry created a whole world on the USS Enterprise, JK Rowling created the Wizarding World, Angie Sage created one of my favorite worlds, the world of a seventh son of a seventh son with a name with seven in it.

Writers, in their own genius creativity, write worlds into existence, cover to cover, create them and steer them in a beautiful direction: forward.

And then I remembered. God created man and women in his image, and God literally spoke creation into existence, and the Bible recorded the event into literary immortality. So if God spoke (literally) everything into existence, and we fall short of His Glory eternally, then couldn’t we create worlds? Not, like, literal, physical worlds, but maybe a literary world, like authors do?

A world you could get just as lost in?

And words, words, the beautiful creation of the written form, constantly taunt and tease me, they challenge me, they call out to me to keep creating and writing worlds into existence. But we don’t need to write worlds into existence to make our words amazing: even I myself have written small phrases, not just worlds, but sometimes even the smallest things have the biggest impacts. (IE, my toddlers.)

(John Marcus has a beautiful mind, seriously, it repeatedly blows mine away. Keep doin your thing, dude.)

Before working in the 2’s and 3’s classrooms at Gateway, I find I can't quite remember what I thought of toddlers. I most likely thought they were very similar to babies: bioorganic lumps of nothing that could barely walk, drooled and screamed, and wore their bathroom.

Even so, I haven’t been working at Gateway for too long (perhaps around 8ish months?), so I'm not sure how valid my thinking is yet, but toddlers are not like babies. Sure, most of the two year olds do still drool significantly, wear a diaper, and, their first few times in a classroom, scream for mama.

But 2 and 3 year olds alike share a beautiful curiosity that I find I can't quite put into words the way it ought to be worded. All the time, my toddlers ask me: “What is this?” and “What is that?”, “How?”, “Where?”, “When?” and it is so beautiful.

They’re small human beings, not learning their place in the world, like I am. For the time being, they are learning the world itself. What it is, what it does, where it goes, why it goes there, when it goes back, everything and anything.

I am, essentially, teaching them to be human. It doesn’t make me nervous, but honored. It is so beautiful that God has put teaching little humans how to be human in my heart, and I have an amazing opportunity to do it right at my own church.

The thing about life is I don’t think there’s just one overlaying statement for all of humanity

We ask “Why?” but I don’t think we realize that, truly, out of nearly 7.4 billion people, there cannot possibly be an answer as to why we all exist. There cannot be one simple statement to define the reason as to why every single person of this race, our race, exists, because everyone has a different reason for it.

Or maybe that’s the answer

Maybe the answer to “Why?” is “Because there are 7.4 billion different reasons.”

Maybe it’s just that everyone has their own answer to why.

I remember I used to think that the reason we all existed was because the only other option was to not exist. But I think it’s not that simple, modern humans aren’t so primitive and instinctual anymore, our sixth sense has been forgotten somewhere, dormant in our genes, our very DNA.

The most modern Homo species, Homo sapien sapien, is a far more mentally evolved being from the first Homo species. And because of that, our reasoning for living has evolved with us. There are, indeed, 7.4 billion answers to “Why?”, but I think that’s the overall answer for our species.

“Why?” “There are 7.4 billion reasons. Mine is ________.”

Nonetheless, life is a beautiful thing. Find your reason.

And, maybe, just maybe, make it something a little more than existing just because the only other option is not existing.

6/25/16

I can remember way back when, when I didn’t think about anything else than the little dumb stuff that was happening in my little dumb life. Oh, and girls, I thought a lot of the other gender.

I absolutely despise how entirely close minded I was way back then, I didn’t even half care about anything that I think about now. The universe was a dead place, the Earth didn’t move, trees and landscapes and moons and sunsets were entirely taken for granted, life, death, love, nature all went unpondered, and art was, perhaps, maybe, something to admire, not anywhere near worth my time to create and spend time over.

I suppose, for the time being, I am content with my growth, but I look forward to the more of it that will undoubtedly come, for we never truly stop growing, even if it seems like we’re done with it.