Lavender Synesthesia

My fingers glide smoothly across the cold ivory keys, finding comfort and solace in the only object I can touch with passion. The musical melody reaches my ears, but my mind is already lost inside of itself. The swift notes come out of my piano's innards, their colors swirl out giving the breath of vibrancy inside a pitch black room. They surround me in their lustful fragrance, wiping away my tears of frustration and making my lips part into a sad smile. The colors blind me as my fingers swoop faster; up and down my painter's palette. Harmonies and chords intertwine, creating my perfect lover.

Her eyes, the color of a blood red rose entrance me, her arms taking me in their bright embrace. Those warm seductive lips caress my cheek, my forehead, but it is when they touch my lips that I react. Breathlessness evades my whole being, my heart beating frantically to the rhythm of the musical spell I have cast upon myself. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to control my breathing.

I know where this leads and it is not pleasurable. The small sense of familiarity is enough to bring me over the edge. I feel the blood running through my veins heat, bringing sensual warmth to my face. My breath comes in short hot gasps, I feel the sense of weightlessness flood me, the colors disappearing as I collapse, fall into myself. I forget everything for a moment as I plummet through miles and miles of loneliness. A sudden stop. I stand up slowly before opening my eyes.

Everything looks familiar, yet at the same time so different. Blackness stretches out in all directions, a cold amber light illuminating the nothingness. I see a silhouette in the distance, soles clicking against nonexistent tiles as it walks toward me.

I could see his face, yet I could not. He was me, and it is impossible to gaze upon myself. Eyes glittered devilishly, bright, confident in his, MY own power. Lips curve up into a challenging smile, uttering in a clear, confident voice.

"Oh my. We can't keep going on like this. You're a mess. Is that the way you want to find a pair of lips, a world to conquer, and bonds that will never tear?"

Eyes look down into the darkness, the hazy amber light entrancing into the spine, making the nervous system spasm in pleasure as if met by beauty. Lips open, a new voice, melancholy harmonizing with the new tone.

"Barely. I am still walking through a path. A blind path. Surely this is the best way to not hurt at all, to forget her eyes, to create my own divine?"

Useless, her face lights up the world around through a sensuous flicker. Blue eyes pierce, cinnamon skin tears, a crystalline voice brings a tiny stab of despair.

Eros' passion drapes warmly over sweet melancholy. Primordial instincts tinge the blackness a boiling scarlet, a blood rose's scent reaching nostrils. Devilish glitter comes back, a hand smooths hair covering the shy mirror back, gallantness inside gestures articulate.

"A small seed flies in the breeze, mindless, with no direction. It is at mercy with the mild wind," Lips are licked as eyes look longingly upwards, "It blooms in life's intersection, warmth of the sun finally making it blossom. Longingly, it tries to reach up through blissful rays. Sweetheart, can't you feel the buzz run through your veins?"

Curving lines, their origins rooted inside the epicurean, beautifying. Soft rose petals hiding the beauty of lustrous pearls. An aroma of vanilla wafts through, breathing life into the canvas of God's most beautiful inception. Wisps of hair fall back, hiding dull eyes. Voice is lost as it tries to slither through blocked vocal chords. Thoughts charged with evasive circumvention fire out of the mind into this world, a frantic fusillading arpeggio.

"Cordial, gracious, diversive, social; I can't understand. I can't rush through and make a fool." Realization comes, dexterity lost. "I never dealt with exclusion. The potentiality is not welcomed in. It frightens, the possibility of turndowns. Eros, fear deafens me to your airy tune."

The image inflates in a steady crescendo. She is the Goddess. Worshiping for years through the windows of visual orbs her steps. A sharp slap interrupts rhythm, orange pain lightning tinging black velvet for a split moment.

"Release the blindfold on yourself, foolish Metus. Atheism is the cure to your Goddess. A single drop of perspiration released into the ocean will only be recognized by the sufferer, even then, it is lost even to those pair of eyes. You will never know the elucidation to your caress, the echo to your furtherance, the backlash to the taste of our lips. Missing abounding events that can be created through the musical instrument given by Nature Herself. The future will no longer have its bright occurrences and wanton expressions."

The seductive voice filled the ambience with warmth, making blood running through veins sizzle. Each word made the portrait shrink, making it become a statuette. The form walked over, brushing my skin ever so slightly. Eyes forced themselves to look up into the deep pools of cerulean. The familiar sense of words being caught in the throat appeared, but Eros, the talented tongue user, was the crucial crutch in this new action. I felt control over my whole self now, sapphire and cherry infusing into a whole being of harmonious lavender. I looked into those eyes, her scent intoxicating in my nostrils. My lips parted, fighting back the strong impulse to lower my face, to let my throat be choked off.

"Excuse me, haven't I seen you somewhere before?"

The first word was enough to shatter my shell. It plunged like a stone into the atmosphere, disrupting the statuette and my whole consciousness. The piano's notes were caressing my ears now, my fingers in turn dancing and twirling over the keys. My lips stretched into a smile as I finished in a small flourish. There was another musical instrument I had to master if I wanted to keep playing the melody that is life. One instrument I had been neglecting since I was a child.

I got off the small bench and settled into my bed, closing my eyes. My lips parted, speaking in Eros' clear, confident voice.

"Good Night."

**********

I see her everyday on the train to school. Her long auburn hair curtains her in all her perfection. I always catch myself staring at her, but as soon as those eyes meet mine, I pretend to be looking into the distance, lost in whatever music my headphones are playing. She must love books, I always see her reading one with a contented smile. I relax, letting those eyes meet mine. As soon as they do, I smile at them contentedly. To my surprise, she smiled back for a few seconds that passed by in slow motion before going back to her book. Sighing softly, I cranked up the volume to the Melody I was playing last night and relaxed against the train's soft seats.

The train hissed to stop and I picked up my schoolbag, wading through the crowd towards the station's exit. A familiar scent hit my nose and I looked to the side, lowering my headphones to my neck.

"Excuse me, haven't I seen you somewhere before?"

She stops and looks at me with a puzzled look. I fight back the choking feeling and force myself to smile apologetically, my hand instinctively ruffling through my hair.

"You know... besides the train."

Her laugh, a beautiful song I had never heard up close at such an astonishing quality made its appearance. She breaks out into her adorable smile.

"Yeah. I go to HCA High too. I don't think I've ever seen you around though."

My finger reaches up to touch the school ID hanging from my bag's strap.

"Yeah, I'm almost always in the library." I roll my eyes sarcastically. "The perfect definition of fun."

She laughs again, her hand reaching up to play with her hair. I smile again.

"What's your name?"

"Krystal. Yours?"

"Kevin. What group you in?"

"I'm in 10-F."

"No way! You're in the same grade as me! I had you figured out to at least be a freshman."

"Oh, shut up. You don't look too mature yourself."

The two of us kept walking in stride, her eyes sparkling whenever they met mine. How is this even possible?

Eros' laugh rang deep in my head. I couldn't help but answer that entertained chuckle.

We get along well, huh? Talking isn't so hard after all. I should let you do this more often.

His clear voice rang sharply, making me inwardly flinch.

You idiot, I am you. You just got out of that shell for something that's actually interesting.

Krystal smiled, handing me her number, waved, and walked away to her home room, the class bell ringing.

This school year is going to be interesting.