They handed it to me 18 years ago, and today I get to say "hm, no thank you."
Why didn't anyone tell me I didn't have to keep it?
It would have been nice if they'd given me the receipt.
I'm sorry, the me you gave me doesn't fit right so I am returning it.
I tried to put on these hips but they don't match my eyes.
My long hair didn't go with these thighs.
Every day I wake up closer to further from it.
And on these days I walk a little taller,
because I am closer to me.
Once it's finally gone I think I'll wait a while before I try on the next one.
If you don't like my limbo you don't have to play it with me.
You can walk upright and go about your day, but I think I'll stay.
Your she's and hers feel disrespectful after my untamed goodbyes.
Like you stood to listen to me sing my final charade in the park and then picked up your dog's shit and walked off.
Well poo, you. It was a performance you wrote anyway, I knew all along I wasn't the actor for the part.
I can't wait to have everyone over to see my new one, I think everyone will nod at my choice of neither. "That color works for you, I wouldn't have thought it would."
"You did a lot of work to pick this out I can tell"
Mine will be seen by those that I have loved and invited into my wonderful smelling home because I love them and have felt them love me.
I suppose this monologue has become somewhat of a spell. I manifest the world that I light this candle for. One where no one needs to regift. Just oo and awe.
Coarse dusk sky powdered like chalk,
Constellation of Gemini permanently blocked.
Cabbage garden in a state of summer heatshock,
Carousel several years still finally rocked,
Can’t anyone see our people are F*cked.
What one thing would I willingly die for?
Sweet dayless slumber or the warriors heart plundered.
Subtle slip into careless blunder or great ocean turmoil take me under.
Blissful succumber to young illness or bashed bloody by bloodlust wonder.
All manors of fate in which I could live in,
to die for you I would gladly pick any sweet brother.