Time passes really quickly. Especially when we are busy over school, sleep and time with others. Sometimes, there is the possibility of combining some of the things, for example spend time with your loved ones while doing things you have to do. But sometimes there is a question coming out of my mind: what if we were able to stop the time? Would it be possible to appreciate the time we have? Would we be able to manage all the time shifts? 

Sometimes I would really love to be able to stop the time, to enjoy every single bit of the moment with the people around me. There is always something in the middle and there is always some obligation. But then, I think: if I had the power of stopping time, everything would be different. I would think more, maybe too much, and this way I would just lose all the good things that happen to me. I know that, if I were able to stop the time, I would have never arrived to this point, to this life. Anything different could have happened and, who knows, I could have known different people, have had different ideas or ideals. This is very interesting to me, but terrifying. What if I didn't have the possibility of being here, knowing the amazing people I do, and spend so much time with them by ending up giving up on sleep, but still being full of energy. All this is just to say: yes, time rushes. Time doesn't give us a second chance. What we have to remember is to enjoy every single bit of our life! Enjoy it until we can and every single time we can, which means always!

I just realized one of the reasons, why I love travelling: it feels so safe to be in the car, in the train, or in the bus. You can see the outside, but it can't touch you directly. You feel close to and distant from it. I can travel for hours, without stopping. I stop eating and drinking too much, reducing my human needs to minimum. Even sleeping feels some sort of safer and more enjoyable. You just zone out and lose yourself and the place. And once you wake up, the place is another, and you are different. Travelling not only allows us to discover new places on earth, but also shows us new bits of our soul, freeing and soothening temporarily the demons, which gringe for new adventures and liberating memories, which can help not only us, but also them to survive in this universe of fear, love and constant hope.

24.07.2016 somewhere between Hungary and Slovenia

You touched my soul.

You touched my mind.

You said you loved me.

I said I loved you too.

You touched my body.

You shattered me.

Then,

You said you didn't care.

You destroyed me.

The worst thing?

I loved it.

I still loved you.

Nowadays, there is a confusion between the word "alone" and "lonely". It is terrible and at the same time terrific to see how people confuse it. And sometimes, I do too. Since I left my boyfriend, or maybe it is more precise to say my ex-boyfriend, I finally understood the difference, and meanings, of the two words. 

Before, I would always be alone, but know that I would always be able to relate to someone, even miles away. It was an LDR. It sounds like an illness, and in a certain way it is. Long Distance Relationships: a way to feel alone, without being lonely. Then it happened: I felt both at the same time, and I knew it was not my fault. I thought it would have been better immediately, I had been naive. Now, time passed, I tried to feel better, and somehow, sometimes, I succeed. I can finally be alone and not feel lonely. Sometimes I fail. Sometimes I catch the true feeling and freedom of being alone.

I woke up this morning and I was no longer 7151 days old. I was one day older, 7152 precisely speaking. It is always funny, and scary at the same time, to see how time rushes. It does not stop, does not forgive and does not remind you of itself. It just keeps going and allows you only to count it and to realize what it is and how it works. It gives you the chance to realize that you do not have much left and that you have to enjoy! 

Enjoy life. Enjoy who you are. Enjoy the rush of time.

@PhynneBelle

It is very interesting how, without a name, we cannot explain who we are. Moreover, there are names that are not possible of pronounciation elsewhere than the country of origin. You can have a name that can be pronounced "right" only in your country and in your language. What about other languages? Does your personality cease to exist, or does your name change the meaning of who you truly are? The name is what our parents give us at our birth and this, consequently, shapes our life. There are meanings of names, which describe the personality of this or that person, with a name or another. I was called Tanya, but my parents were planning on calling me Zena. Does this mean that being Zena I would have been a different person? Does this mean that I would have had a different personality and different character? I will never know it. 

What I know now is: my name is Tanya. This helps me to define myself.But... what if I didn't have a name? What then?