Your Family’s Diamonds
Your vulnerability is of the highest quality
My wounds touched a sore point, stitched back together by your silver needle
Excruciating pain, but your sun shines back at me
Your love is my holy grail
My life, an open book, rip out the pages that belong to my past
Lost in the darkest nights between vitality and the colossal emptiness
Your love is an observation of my true self
My poems, a pathetic imitation of your magnificent self
Lilac butterflies creating a halo over your head
Your family's diamonds united into one incomprehensible person
My lies, the only thing I used to feel
Excruciating pain, but your moon shines back at me
Morphine
Nothing that I adore more, nothing I am more afraid of
Give me a hundred lives, I would choose you every single time
Unremarkable, unrecognizable
Ripped at every edge
Psychotropic agent to hold it all together
Break a bone to hold it all together
Chronically ill, pain so unbearable
Still smiling, still holding on
Numb or being damned, what will they choose?
Stuck under a paper bag, takes my breath away
Draw a funny face on it
Bulid up the courage to pull the trigger
Grins on their faces as they pull the trigger
Oh, how amusing their faces appear
Nothing more soothing to observe
Nothing more joyful
Addicted to the pain, rescue on a golden spoon
Wish I could be like they should be
Blood boils when our eyes lock
Feeling relieved, I'm going blind
Grew up in the psych ward
Save me from my enemies
Protect me from those centipedes
They consume my memories
Lilac
White noise is what I'm after
Perfection, goodness, neutrality
Stark, cold and isolation simultaneously
You describe the color white, you are referring to me
Two extremes merged in one person, I'm flattered
Two extremes weigh me down
Only anger and sadness, only red and blue
Discovering a middle ground, human error
Continue searching for the purple
I don't know the purpose
Can't find peace within myself
No satisfaction when it comes to my presence
You are like a rare, indestructible lilac dimond beautifully formed by the pressure you put on yourself
Forced to stay with me, I can't expect that from you
Your presence is a reward
Devoting a second of your limited time to me
You are the middle ground, safety is all I feel
Struggling to put the intense self-hatred into words
Projecting myself onto you
Still believing one can only receive love when they love themselves
But what is there to love?
Desperately seeking something
They will give up on me, I have given up on myself
I knew it from the start
I keep repeating myself like a broken record
Mentally preparing myself
It will pass
But ho am I without my two extremes?
Between the Castle and the River
Drifting away to sound of your voice
My love, an unbreakable promise
Fire inside me I thought had become dormant
Silence in my brain when I feel your skin striking mine
Your skin like porcelain, patched together by your past
Within your walls, a colossal gentleness
Lilac flowers covering your eyes, overlooking your magnificence
Silence in my brain when our bodies collide
You taught me how to quench my thirst
How to love without reservation
There might be something good in me if you allow me be yours
Silence in my brain when I gaze at your silhouette
Fire Achat
Your beauty so underestimated you might overlook it
The epitome of splendor
Not a day goes by where I'm not stunned by your faculties
You pierce straight to the core
Filling up the room with your glorious presence
Curled up in your embrace, crawling under your skin
My lifeline in this dystopia
I know you keep me save
Angle wings on your splendid self, the response to all the pain
Your eyes like fire achat
Ease when I reconnoitre our fate
Our souls are the same, connected before my first breath
You take me back to my purity, all white, all black
I gasp for air, inhaling every word you speak
Lowlight after lowlight, I would do it all again
To become acquainted with you
My vulnerability, gift-wrapped on a silver plate, is all I can offer
Gazing at your every move
Missing piece to the bigger picture
Violets across your chest
Begging for misery
But only with your company
Crying tears of delight, all red, all blue
Wiping away all tragedy
Waiting for you, while picking petals of the rose
Meet me at your Red River
Thouch of hell
My blood turns dusky
Raindrops on my lips
While you fantasie about a kiss
Puking down your throat only jogs my memory
Squirming in the fury
While your hand is down your pants
You're a prowling hell
Your god is dying of amnesia
Scared stiff of your desire
Eyes on your every move
No intervention, no clue
Repenting all my misdeeds
Enticed you to be your perverted self
Through the mist a quiet admission
Trying to distinguish myself from prey
Pinching my last bit of purity
Devouring my sanity
Now in full possession of my faculties
I know your primal instinct
My tears are what you've earned
There is no remedy
Bury me still vividly
Lead me to my destiny
No one left to execute
Let's play hide and seek
Soliloquy
You're the only one lingering
You found solace in the solitude
Please quench my thirst
You will get nothing from me, there is nothing left
I'm a real piece of shit
Please quench my thirst
Pull out my teeth one by one
Hurt me, kill me
Please quench my thirst
You're the only one who ignites
Smoke on your skin makes those pretty eyes roll
Please quench my thirst
The horns on your head are from God himself
You will see him later in a bodybag
Please quench my thirst
Your heart a jar of moths
Scars show your determination
Please quench my thirst
You will never have to go to sleep again
I will pretend that your defense is working
Please quench my thirst
I'm a clown
Clinging on the last bit of hope
Please quench my thirst
I look deep into your soulless eyes
You're crying diamonds
Please quench my thirst
I sat sail but you don't care
Red river filled with saltwater
Please quench my thirst