Hello everyone, I am currently in the process of writing a new book. I originally started it on Wattpad, so most updates will be done there first... but I wanted to post my story here as well since I seem to get more activity on here in general. I currently have 4 parts/chapters done already, but only 2 are posted at the moment, so once the other 2 get posted I'll make sure to post them in the book here as well as a post to let any potential readers know. I would greatly appreciate it if anyone could read and share. If you see any issues feel free to leave a comment, I just ask that everyone be kind and respectful.

***11 Years ago***

Rhiannon's POV:

I woke up to yelling and screaming in the middle of the night. I was only 10yrs old; I saw flashes of light and fire coming from my window. I began to panic as one of the guards burst into my room telling me we needed to run. "Princess, we need to get you to safety!" He whispered as we snuck through the castle's hidden passageways.

"Where's mommy and daddy?" I asked terrified. He looked at me with sympathy as tears continued to sting my eyes. "I want my mommy and daddy, I'm not going anywhere without them! We need to go back for them!" I was finding it hard to breathe. I was having a panic attack and my mom and dad always knew how to settle them. I couldn't seem to stop crying either.

The guard crouched down to my level and asked me, "Rhiannon, do you remember a couple of years ago, when you found yourself lost in the woods? When we found you, what did your mother tell you?" I nodded, unable to find my voice. "She told you that no matter what happened just remember that she and your father will always be with you. She told you that you were very strong, and because of that a lot of people wanted you and would do anything in their power to get to you, but never forget they would always be there for you in some way or another... Right?" Again I nodded.

I started to see where he was going with this... "Mommy and daddy are coming are they?" I said, barely a whisper, more of a squeak. He didn't get a chance to respond as the sounds of the same people who attacked my pack began getting closer. The guard grabbed me and began running. We came to an opening, he set me down and told me to run as fast as I could. "I can't, I need you." I cried out not wanting to go by myself.

"Princess Rhiannon, I need to stay behind to give you a head start. NOW RUN!!!" I saw the shadows of the dangerous people getting closer. I looked at him one last time before booking it out of the small opening. I ran as fast and as far as I could! I came to a big cave as my legs began to give out. I did my best to get into the cave before I officially passed out.

As I entered I saw a big black wolf, but something about his presence made me feel safe. Last thing I remembered before everything went black, was this wolf coming over as I went down.

Vasiliy's POV:

It's been a week since the rogue attack on my pack; the one that killed my mother and father. I'm only 15, I wasn't supposed to become Alpha until I was at least 18. But alas, I'm stuck having to rush learning everything to be alpha at 15 so my pack can keep running and get stronger. I was out on my nightly run that I do when I get too stressed out. I had found this cave a few years back. It's my favorite place to hide, because it's quiet and I can enjoy the moonlight without anyone being able to find me. And since my first shift happened sooner than it was meant to, it gave me time to get to know my wolf. Most wolves don't shift until their 18th birthday, but I ended up having a forced shift a few weeks ago during the attack. It was very painful, and I was scared I was going to die, like most wolves who ended up having an early force shift due to trauma.

As I laid in my usual spot, enjoying the peace and quiet under the moonlight, I heard heavy breathing and running feet. I stood up ready to protect myself, when from the shadows came a little girl. She looked to be only 9 or 10. She had been crying and had fear and terror written all over her face. She froze when she saw me, but then she began to sway. I'm not sure who she was, or where she came from, but something told me to get her to safety. My wolf caught her as she passed out from sheer exhaustion.

We brought her further into the cave out of sight. We sniffed at her and could smell her wolf. She laid still, out of breath and energy. She was only a pup. My wolf, Jax, said we needed to protect her. So we got her covered so she'd be warm and protected, until we could return with more help. After we were satisfied that she'd be safe we ran back to the pack house in search of help.

It took an hour to get back to the packhouse, then an hour to get back, with about 30 minutes in between to gather the necessary assistance. When we arrived back at the cave the little girl was gone. I felt dread. I was worried about that poor pup, she had the same look of sadness and fear I had when I found out my parents were killed. I had my pack warriors spread out and search the forest for her... 'There's no way she could've gotten far on her own.' I thought to myself. My stomach dropped further when the warriors came back empty handed.

I need to find that girl. I'm not sure why, but my wolf and I feel so connected to her. Like we're meant to protect her no matter what. After 5 hrs with no results, I had the warriors head back to the pack house. I'm not sure where she would've gone, but I pray to Moon Goddess that wherever she had gone she'd be safe.

Rhiannon POV:

I'm not sure how long I was out, but when I woke up I felt like I wasn't actually awake at first. I couldn't really move, so I started to look around and realize I was inside my own mind. As I started retrace my steps and actions and wondering if maybe I was in a coma I saw a beautiful white wolf with streaks of red and gold. She saw me begin to panic and dropped down. Laying on her stomach with her head on her paws like she was trying to tell me that she was no threat. I tilted my head with curiosity. She began to army crawl toward me as I slowly got down to her level trying to let her know I was no threat to her either. As she reached me she nudged me with her nose, so I took that as an invite to pet her head.

Her fur was so soft and comforting. I asked her if she was lost like me and she just shook her head no. She let out a little huff sound like she was laughing at my question, then I remember I'm in my own head. "Right..." I chuckled nervously at myself. "Who are you and why am I in my own head? Am I in a coma, or worse dead?" I began to ramble a bunch of questions not really wanting the answers, but knowing I needed them.

As I began to lose myself in my panicked rambling, she put her paw on my leg to stop me. She then gave me a serious look like she was trying to read my soul or tell me something telepathically. After a few minutes I began to hear her speaking to me. "Rhiannon, my name is Calypso. I'm your wolf. I've been taking care of us for the last couple of days. I felt you begin to stir so I'm here to check on you." Her voice was so soft and gentle. But then I got confused.

"My wolf? I'm not supposed to get my wolf until I'm 16." Most wolves get their wolf at 18, but me being a royal meant my wolf would come a couple of years early, but I was only 10.

"Yes, that's how it's supposed to go, but you just dealt with a very traumatic experience. Trauma can cause a forced shift a lot sooner than its meant to. Luckily for you, I did my best to hold back until you got as far as you could. I didn't want to hurt you, and if I had come out sooner you would've definitely been hurt really bad." She was keeping her voice soft trying not to scare me, especially when I'm pretty sure my panic was visible on my face at the thought of what could've gone wrong had she been like other wolves and came out to protect me in the moment. "I promise, we're still very much alive, especially thanks to the wolf that hid you before he left."

I remembered the wolf she was talking about. But then I began to wonder... "Wait, where did he go?" Something about him made me feel safe. So I had some questions for him.

She looked at me with an unreadable expression. "I honestly don't remember much after you went down, I was slightly busy working my way to the surface. Although, I think he mentioned something about going to get help. I'm not going to lie to you, I wasn't sure whether or not he was trust worthy, so once I was out I took off. I didn't want to risk us getting her or being put in danger. I felt safe around him too, but I didn't want to take the risk." As she finished she looked to the floor like she was ashamed of her decision, or like she was worried I'd be mad.

"It's okay Calypso, I understand. If anything I should thank you." I gave her small smile as she looked up at me. "So, where are we out there? is it safe for me to come out?" She licked my face happy to hear that I wasn't upset with her.

"We're nearing a little human village I had sniffed out. I figured humans would be safer for us for a while. We can switch soon, I just want to get us as close as possible first. But once we switch you'll have to stay in human form for a while. I will be with you at all times, but I won't be able to come out as often, at least not without sneaking away. Although, any time we're not in this village, I feel like it was be safest with me out, because no one knows who I am because I'm technically not supposed to exist for another 6 years." She had a good point in both aspects.

Once we got to the outskirts of the village, we found a safe hiding spot to shift. She had found some clothes for me to change into afterwards. Once I was dressed, I snuck into the village and did my best to act like I belonged. I snuck into the classes to attempt to continue my education. Once I hit my teenage years I was able to join a gym. I even made some friends who when they learned about my past, well enough to know that I had trauma and that I was both homeless and an orphan, they would take turns having me spend the nights with them and they introduced me to this dojo instructor who helped me learn self-defense as well as how to stay one step ahead at all times.

***11 Years ago***

Rhiannon's POV:

I woke up to yelling and screaming in the middle of the night. I was only 10yrs old; I saw flashes of light and fire coming from my window. I began to panic as one of the guards burst into my room telling me we needed to run. "Princess, we need to get you to safety!" He whispered as we snuck through the castle's hidden passageways.

"Where's mommy and daddy?" I asked terrified. He looked at me with sympathy as tears continued to sting my eyes. "I want my mommy and daddy, I'm not going anywhere without them! We need to go back for them!" I was finding it hard to breathe. I was having a panic attack and my mom and dad always knew how to settle them. I couldn't seem to stop crying either.

The guard crouched down to my level and asked me, "Rhiannon, do you remember a couple of years ago, when you found yourself lost in the woods? When we found you, what did your mother tell you?" I nodded, unable to find my voice. "She told you that no matter what happened just remember that she and your father will always be with you. She told you that you were very strong, and because of that a lot of people wanted you and would do anything in their power to get to you, but never forget they would always be there for you in some way or another... Right?" Again I nodded.

I started to see where he was going with this... "Mommy and daddy are coming are they?" I said, barely a whisper, more of a squeak. He didn't get a chance to respond as the sounds of the same people who attacked my pack began getting closer. The guard grabbed me and began running. We came to an opening, he set me down and told me to run as fast as I could. "I can't, I need you." I cried out not wanting to go by myself.

"Princess Rhiannon, I need to stay behind to give you a head start. NOW RUN!!!" I saw the shadows of the dangerous people getting closer. I looked at him one last time before booking it out of the small opening. I ran as fast and as far as I could! I came to a big cave as my legs began to give out. I did my best to get into the cave before I officially passed out.

As I entered I saw a big black wolf, but something about his presence made me feel safe. Last thing I remembered before everything went black, was this wolf coming over as I went down.

Vasiliy's POV:

It's been a week since the rogue attack on my pack; the one that killed my mother and father. I'm only 15, I wasn't supposed to become Alpha until I was at least 18. But alas, I'm stuck having to rush learning everything to be alpha at 15 so my pack can keep running and get stronger. I was out on my nightly run that I do when I get too stressed out. I had found this cave a few years back. It's my favorite place to hide, because it's quiet and I can enjoy the moonlight without anyone being able to find me. And since my first shift happened sooner than it was meant to, it gave me time to get to know my wolf. Most wolves don't shift until their 18th birthday, but I ended up having a forced shift a few weeks ago during the attack. It was very painful, and I was scared I was going to die, like most wolves who ended up having an early force shift due to trauma.

As I laid in my usual spot, enjoying the peace and quiet under the moonlight, I heard heavy breathing and running feet. I stood up ready to protect myself, when from the shadows came a little girl. She looked to be only 9 or 10. She had been crying and had fear and terror written all over her face. She froze when she saw me, but then she began to sway. I'm not sure who she was, or where she came from, but something told me to get her to safety. My wolf caught her as she passed out from sheer exhaustion.

We brought her further into the cave out of sight. We sniffed at her and could smell her wolf. She laid still, out of breath and energy. She was only a pup. My wolf, Jax, said we needed to protect her. So we got her covered so she'd be warm and protected, until we could return with more help. After we were satisfied that she'd be safe we ran back to the pack house in search of help.

It took an hour to get back to the packhouse, then an hour to get back, with about 30 minutes in between to gather the necessary assistance. When we arrived back at the cave the little girl was gone. I felt dread. I was worried about that poor pup, she had the same look of sadness and fear I had when I found out my parents were killed. I had my pack warriors spread out and search the forest for her... 'There's no way she could've gotten far on her own.' I thought to myself. My stomach dropped further when the warriors came back empty handed.

I need to find that girl. I'm not sure why, but my wolf and I feel so connected to her. Like we're meant to protect her no matter what. After 5 hrs with no results, I had the warriors head back to the pack house. I'm not sure where she would've gone, but I pray to Moon Goddess that wherever she had gone she'd be safe.

She was just a young girl when the abuse started. The memories continue to haunt her dream worlds. The most haunting and bone chilling of these nightmares came about 3 weeks ago. The nightmare was yet another memory, but seemed super extra and had added some horror movie ideas thanks to her awake anxiety lately. When the nightmare started she was back to a young child...

"Mommy, please to leave me." She cried and begged as her mother left for an appointment. "Sweetie, you'll be fine, you get to hang out with dad today. Don't you enjoy hanging out with dad?" The girl's mother was exhausted due to being 8.5 months pregnant with the girl's little sister.

Mom left the girl in silent tears, she was blind to the things going on in her absence. Her father was downstairs last she checked, so she did the only thing she thought was safe and bolted to her room and proceeded to shut and block the door. Little did this poor child know that her father had been drinking and in one of his 'moods'. As his footsteps got closer, his voice and the anger and lust mixed into it was getting louder. This girl was only 6yrs old. He went to wiggle the handle, but was unable to get the door open easily. This enraged him more than he already was, but sadly the girl's barricade was no match for his extra rage and he blew right into it slamming the door open as this girl screamed in fear and pain. A piece of her now shattered wooden toybox flew into her arm like an oversize splinter sticking from her shoulder. Father didn't seem to give two flying flips as he continued towards her. There was an odd flame in his eyes, one that not even her mother had seen, and the wicked smile he wore was no better. Once he was close enough to grab her and as he did he made sure to use that giant splinter to his advantage against her. He started ripping her clothes off of her as she begged him to stop. "Well you little bitch, I'd be gentler like I usually am, but you chose to piss me off..." he spat at her. The thing is that even as a 6yr old she knew this wasn't something that her father was supposed to be doing. The issue is that every time she tried to tell someone no one believed her because it seemed too made up and/or because it was way too out of character for him. Her mother never believed her because she thought maybe he was just watching inappropriate movies around her, so when mom went to talk to dad she told him to stop watching inappropriate movies around the child. This alone enraged the girls father because this informed him that she had tried telling after he's made more than enough threats to her about saying a word. Which brings us back to this scene. The night he decided to be rougher with this girl than 'usual' because he was angry. It was so bad that she was barely clinging to life when he was finished with her. Obviously, he didn't take her to a hospital, instead he decided to clean her up himself and sadly for the girl, but lucky for this monster, the easy to see marks that were left after clean up looked more or less like she had gotten hurt by falling from a high place or running into something, so he made sure he got his story straight before mom got home. As the girl had awoken from her close call with death she realized that she was no longer laying in that bed with the physical pain she had recently been put through like she always did and instead was standing over the bed crying for her own daughter. For some reason this nightmare put her daughter in her place. The same man, same house and bed, same scars, but instead of this girl it was her daughter laying in the bed. Her husband was out talking with police while her father and step monster evilly grinned at her from their front yard through the bedroom window. As the girl turned around back to her daughter realization hit, her daughter was not only sexually assaulted by her grandfather, but maliciously killed by the step monster... She broke so bad. There was nothing she could do. Her daughter had been missing for a while and when she was finally found she had her innocence viciously taken as well as her life. And there was nothing she could've done. She cried and screamed until she fell silent seconds from being awoken to the real world by her husband holding her as her tears stained his pillow. Once the panic settled he asked her if she wanted to talk about it, but she declined.. Within seconds panic resurfaced as she jolted out of bed and flew to their 3yr old daughters room and to her bedside. She NEEDED to see that her baby was safe and sound at home, even if doing so ended up waking the toddler.

The saddest part about all of this is that for this girl the sexual assault and abuse to her from this horrible nightmare was some ish that she had to live through. I mean luckily for this girl the physical abuse of it wasn't as extreme and she didn't actually have a close call with death, but she was sexually abused and hit and no one believed her until she had turned 8yr old. And the sexual assault alone had been happening since as far back as she could remember around the time she was 4yrs old at the earliest, maybe even before that. There was also instances after that, one of which being the day before her 8th birthday and only six months before anyone was able to actually hear her and save her. That little girl is the same person writing this Nightmare, the same person who had survived through her father sexually abusing her, amongst other things. No I do NOT allow that monster and his wife anywhere near my child and I make sure I know where she is and who she's with my top priority without allowing myself to become a helicopter parent like my narcissist mother did throughout my teenage year. I mean my daughter is only 3yrs old, so the only reason I would need to worry about her getting into any trouble is if the people she's with tend to get into trouble, which I have this thing where if I don't get good vibes and don't feel any form of trust worth valuing then you don't get time with my child with out me and/or my husband around.

The walls cave in,

As darkness falls.

The demons lurk,

As flames engulf.

The silence is deafening,

As water drowns.

My world comes crubling,

As I fall down.

Life goes on,

But feels like an end.

My light is dimming,

I need a friend.

I feel so weak,

I feel so sad.

Why do I cry,

When I get mad.

Depression is real,

Anxiety sucks.

I feel so jinxed,

and out of luck.

Please be patient,

Please be kind.

I'm trying my best,

To not lose my mind.

Asking for help,

Is very hard.

For someone like me,

Broken with a big heart!

Ladies, we are all different, but we all deserve the best! Some of us are single, some of us are married, and some of us are somewhere in between. Some of us don’t have children, some of us have many children, and some of us either don’t want children, or we want children and/or are trying. There are some of us who even though we would love to have children of our own we are unable to and end up having to either get help from a surrogate or go through the system to adopt. Those of us that are moms we all having different parenting techniques, but for the most part always have our children’s best interest in mind. Some of us were able to give birth to our children vaginally, while some of us chose the route of c-section, and some of us who chose c-section may not have had any other choice without worrying about losing our babies. Some of us were able to go without any pain medication while giving birth, while some of us couldn’t take the pain and decided to go straight for the epidural. Some of us women, in general, can heal pretty quickly, while some of us take a bit longer. No two stories are exactly alike and no two women are exactly alike! Yet I continuously see, hear and get so much judgement about life choices, parenting techniques, and what we choose to wear for our weight and body types. Some of us do better and thrive with going to work while also taking care of ourselves and our families, while some of us thrive better staying home and taking care of ourselves, families and home without the stress of work as well. We shouldn’t be judging and tearing each other down for not being the same… We should be congratulating and building each other up. When I see someone who is on the bigger side of plus sized walking around in a tube top and mini skirt I think to myself, wow she has confidence and looks amazing we need more women like her in this world. I see a mom at the park with her babies letting them explore, while keeping an eye on them from a distance, I think to myself, wow that’s a mom who can trust her kids to be their own person while making sure they’re doing so safely. We are all women and we all get the same type of judgement from society of, “You have to be a size two with a big butt and big tatas to be considered beautiful!” And we all know that’s not true!! Every woman is beautiful in her own way no matter her size, shape, or skin color! We all want the same thing to be able to love ourselves, but how can we love ourselves if we’re constantly being belittled by society and each other. I mean isn’t it enough that we get it from society and media? Why do we feel the need to give the same judgement, we’re all already getting, to each other? We all deserve love from ourselves and each other. We all deserve a break from our everyday lives every once and a while, We all deserve to be built up to be the queens we were meant to be! We are queens of different types. We are not the same and we will never be the same! Honestly the world would be a very boring place if we were all the same… I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t want to live in a boring world! I would like to live in a world where everyone has their own uniqueness to put into the world. We’re not robots that were built to be the same and run off of the same mainframe… We are human beings who were built to have our own free will of thought, beliefs, styles, thoughts, views. We were built to be different and we shouldn’t judge each other and tear each other down because of those differences that make us human, we should encourage each other to be even more different! It’s okay to be the woman who’d rather be the “typical house wife” of not having a typical paying job because you believe your job is to be at home taking care of the house and kids and then when you’re man, or woman, get home from their money paying job be there to greet them and get them a beer and make them dinner, rub their feet, or whatever it takes to take the stress and tension of work off of them so they can relax. But it’s also okay to be the woman who is driven to break away from that definition of a “typical house wife” and be the one who goes to work and pays the bills, because either way is the right way to live your life cause guess what… It’s your life your choices. No one can tell you how to live YOUR life. That being said… You don’t have a right to tell other women how to live their life! We’re all doing the best we can to survive this crazy and chaotic world, don’t add negativity and judgement to the flames.

The room was eerily dim with only one window... I was stuck here with 11 men who acted as if they knew best. so much so that when making a decision on the case they all automatically agreed that the suspect, Mrs. Lockwood, was definitely guilty for the murder of her husband, Mr. Lockwood. None of them even glanced at the files and reports, there was no talking, or anything. They just wanted to go in and agree so they could go home and drink beer while catcalling the women walking down the street. When I asked what were they basing their judgement on, they replied with, "We heard all we need to hear in the courtroom, she's obviously guilty. There was even a witness for heaven's sake... What other proof do you need?" Well I, as the only woman in the room and obviously the only logical one who actually read through the files, had my doubts of Mrs. Lockwood being guilty. As I was looking over the reports, refusing to give an answer forcing them to sit and listen to my reasons to why I disagree with their verdict, I saw something that was not mentioned in the court... The, so-called, witness had previouly attempted to hit on Mrs. Lockwood. In the reports Mrs. Lockwood had mentioned that the witness, Mr. Rouge, did not like the thought of her turning him down and threatened her with, "If I can't have you then no one will have you!!!" This report was made by Mrs. Lockwood on March 7th of 2010, only one year prior to the current case. In the report she stated that she didn't know what he meant and was scared for her life, but it was dismissed due to the fact that Mr. Rouge was a well-known and very loved member of the community. There was also evidence missing from the files, such as finger prints that were supposedly found, but also supposedly didn't match anyone in the system. With a bit more deep reading through the reports in the files, I had found something very curious. The officer that took down Mrs. Lockwood's report in 2010, who swore that Mr. Rouge was so loved and well-known and would never hit on or threaten a married woman, was the same officer that collected the report from the witness and entered the evidence into the report. Something seemed very suspicious to me, so I brought it up to the men. Once I was able to get them to actually look in the files, they finally saw my point of veiw and all started to change their votes, one by one, from guilty to not-guilty. Within about 10 minutes we finally had a final verdict of not-guilty. After all was said and done, Mrs. Lockwood went home while Mr. Rouge was placed behind bars and officer Kingston lost his job and started had an investigation started on him to find see if there was more that could land him behind bars with Mr. Rouge.

The walls cave in,

As darkness falls.

The demons lurk,

As flames engulf.

The silence is deafening,

As water drowns.

My world comes crubling,

As I fall down.

Life goes on,

But feels like an end.

My light is dimming,

I need a friend.

I feel so weak,

I feel so sad.

Why do I cry,

When I get mad.

Depression is real,

Anxiety sucks.

I feel so jinxed,

and out of luck.

Please be patient,

Please be kind.

I'm trying my best,

To not lose my mind.

Asking for help,

Is very hard.

For someone like me,

Broken with a big heart!