The night seems endless, tranquil.

I‘m not myself anymore...

Peaceful

Night has dawned

But I cannot fall asleep

It isn’t the same anymore...

The long wavelength of chatter flow across the distance of the room, 

and into me

I long to understand the mystery of the bleak darkness.

Was there an unholy monster lurking in the dark, waiting for me to inch closer? 

I can’t sleep

Do you understand?

Thoughts, 

Like a depressing lullaby 

Lingers in my mind 

If the brain is an uncompromising piece of machinery,

Why can’t it shut off? 

It continues to pound at me like a hungry, desperate wolf, 

attacking at full force. 

My chest heaves up and down, 

Steady with rhythm,

My breathing soon smoothens, 

It’s a red herring,

I cannot fall asleep

I can’t sleep

I want to sleep

Days and nights

Days and nights 

I hold out a humble hand, 

I struggle with the darkness, unwilling to let it engulf me

Suddenly, my body swells up

the bed has turned into the den of the hideous monster! 

It wants to entrap me in eternal solitude

My heartbeat accelerates, 

My defense mechanism turns on, 

I’m ready to fight

I’m stepping in, 

Caged

In rage

Alone

I can’t sleep

I shut my eyes tight, 

But my brain is still—

Wide awake

At night

The world is silent 

I see it with more clarity

I wake

I lay back down 

And the night will passThe night seems endless, tranquil.

Peaceful

Night has dawned

But I cannot fall asleep

The long wavelength of chatter flow across the distance of the room, 

and into me

I long to understand the mystery of the bleak darkness.

Was there an unholy monster lurking in the dark, waiting for me to inch closer? 

I can’t sleep

Do you understand?

Thoughts, 

Like a depressing lullaby 

Lingers in my mind 

If the brain is an uncompromising piece of machinery,

Why can’t it shut off? 

It continues to pound at me like a hungry, desperate wolf, 

attacking at full force. 

My chest heaves up and down, 

Steady with rhythm,

My breathing soon smoothens, 

It’s a red herring,

I cannot fall asleep

I can’t sleep

I want to sleep

Days and nights

Days and nights 

I hold out a humble hand, 

I struggle with the darkness, unwilling to let it engulf me

Suddenly, my body swells up

the bed has turned into the den of the hideous monster! 

It wants to entrap me in eternal solitude

My heartbeat accelerates, 

My defense mechanism turns on, 

I’m ready to fight

I’m stepping in, 

Caged

In rage

Alone

I can’t sleep

I shut my eyes tight, 

But my brain is still—

Wide awake

At night

The world is silent 

I see it with more clarity

I wake

I lay back down 

And the night will pass

I can’t sleep.

I flip over and over

again and again

I can’t sleep

its hard.

I close my eyes

But my mind doesn’t stop thinking.

I can’t sleep.

Too much pondering,

troubles

I‘m asleep no more.

I can’t sleep.

I flip over and over

again and again

I can’t sleep

its hard.

I close my eyes

But my mind doesn’t stop thinking.

I can’t sleep.

Too much pondering,

troubles

I‘m asleep no more.

I wake up to a soul spliting headache, my eyes anguish from the burning light that was coming in from somewhere. I don't remember my room having windows though. I open my eyes, and it just registers to me that I am not in my room, and I was not laying on my ever so soft matress bed, but on a rough wooden mat. Slowly, I pick myself up, my head still killing me. The furniture seemed vintage, not to mention it was dusty. There was a large square window where sunlight has been pouring in from. Where am I?

"Hey, you awake now?" I look around, and from the doorway, stood someone...familar. "You don't remember me?" She presses.

"It's me." My eyes glare open.

"But... I thought you were dead..."

I‘m afraid, afraid that good times would end,

and you’ll melt away, like the winter snow.

I know nothing ever lasts, but— how much I wish

our times together will be forever.

The wheel of time will never stop for anything,

not the fact that I will always love you with every inch of my being,

or my unfulfilled promise

to you.

The snow melts, the seconds ticks by,

every moment is a countdown.

Eventually, your face will dim in my memories,

your voice will fade away.

But, I’ll never forget

that you were a integral part of my story...

The cafeteria, as always buzz with noises. I automatically walk to the second table on the right side and plopped my backpack down on the small seat, which made a loud thump. "Geez, chill." Lo whines as she scrapes her chestnut hair away from her face. I roll my eyes, and unzip my backpack to take out my still decently put together chemistry notebook, and begin doing the homework due today. "Lemme copy after you're done." Lo casually says.

         "Shut up."  said Madeline, or 'Maddy' as I prefer to call her. Maddy also matches with my name, Sal. Sally White, is the name my mother gave me, because she thought I looked like a Sally to her, plain old Sally, but I resonate more with Sal, so I make people call me Sal instead of Sally. Lo lets out a light grunt and Maddy looks up from her brand new MacBook, her eyes spoke of annoyance.

         "Samantha and Chloe went to stall you, didn't they?"

         "I saw them giggling about it when they walked away. Those bitches." Lo added. I didn't say anything, it was pointless. "Seriously, it's so annoying. Those bitches are fucking retarded." Maddy rolled her eyes at Lo. She was always low key disapproval of Lo's extensive use of profanity, I guess Christians don't curse.

         "Aren't you tired?" Maddy asked. Aren't you tired? The word vibrated across my mind for three long seconds before I slipped out a weak response.

         "I guess." Maddy didn't seem convinced.

"Let me rephrase my question." She paused for a moment, then continued, "do you want to live the rest of your life like this?"

         "Like what?" I asked.

         "Like a—like nothing. Like dust! Do you want to live under your mom's claws until you get out of college?" Lo nodded in agreement.

         "I...l guess there's no other option." Maddy let out a long sigh.

         "Sal hon, it's not even certain if you can get into London Business School. Do you really want to risk it?" Risk? My father worked in London, he immigrated there after my parents' marriage failed. I heard he formed a new family, but I would never know for sure, he never invited mom to his wedding. Made sense, but still. It's true, London Business School isn't easy to get into, but that's the most desirable school for me. It was far, far enough from mom, but close enough to not totally lose my family. Father had always been a gentle and caring man. If mom didn't come home drunk every then and now... I guess that wasn't even the tipping point. When mom started going out with another man, dad finally felt like his pride and honor as a man was being challenged, thus, it developed to a point where the divorce became inevitable.

         "I'm sorry Sallie, I guess I can't wait to see you grow into the amazing women you'll become." To this day, I can still vividly recall the moment we shared together. He was wearing a white winter coat, the one with one button missing, and dark jeans, youthful but serious. I guess, somewhere deep within the corners of my heart, I still couldn't forgive mom for shattering the best moments of my life I've ever known.

         "What do you say then?"  I asked, maybe too roughly.

         "Run away, elope with me." Maddy said as a matter of factly. I scrunch my face in disbelief.

         "What? Why? You?" I barely veiled the disbelief in my tone. Maddy? Madeleine Waters? The girl who owns everything she possibly wants, lives a life of pure luxury that every girl would happily exchange for, and has the most loving parents (not to mention incredibly handsome and gorgeous) that ever graced earth, and she's suggesting me to elope with her? Is she crazy?

         "There's things that are beyond the surface Sal." I paused, and was only glad that the bell had rung at that precise moment. Saved by the bell, I guess that's really a thing.

         "I'll definitely think about it." I reply. But Maddy's desperate eyes didn't leave mine while I packed my belongings and backpack together and, finally, we parted ways as we headed to our first period classrooms.

         But the thought lingered in my head, can I just leave? I mean, if Maddy is willing to risk everything she has now, why can't I? After all, what more did I have to lose? What did I deserve if I wasn't willing to risk for anything?

He was busy. His hand that held the pencil glided nonstop across the page. She almost made a sound, but contained herself at the end. He will never belong to her, at least not in reality. But he was too amazing of a person for her to take her eyes off. So she watched, just for another moment... until the pen dropped.