I won’t let them stop me

Looking at me with confused faces

Looking at me like I’m nothing

I am more than everything

Because I am me

The center of my own universe

And so I am absolute.

I am everything in my own mind

Because no one dared to come in

And so be it

Because that means more room for me.

For I, myself

my own wishes and desires

They are the only things that matter

And I won’t let anyone stop me

Because this is my life

And it’s all that I have

All that I care for

And all that I need

And I deserve that much.

Call me selfish

Call me lazy

But this is the only life I have

the only life I get

And I am the center.

I am in control.

I make the rules.

I

am

everything

to me.

This is all I have.

My life.

It is the one thing I own

And can never be taken.

It is rightfully mine

and with it

I rule myself alone.

I can think of the options

But I will always come first

And the consequences may hurt

But I will always do what I want

For me

For my life

That I deserve.

I’ll do what I can

To escape what i don’t prefer

And i know that it’s selfish

And childish

And lazy

But this is my life

And I will accept the consequences

Of the actions I choose

And do as I please.

I know it’s unfair

But I’ve had enough

And I’m tired

Of trying to keep up

with lives that

just

aren't

mine.

I may be a disappointment

But this is my life

And i think i can bear

Being called that.

I wish i were dead

But not yet

I have things to do

I have to live for today

And tomorrow

And for whatever comes after that

I have to believe that I'm worth it

That the world needs me

That the world wants me

That I need the world too

And I can accept it

And profit from it

And i will survive, I swear

I’ll make it there

I’ll do what I have to do

Because in the end

Even if I'm never happy

I will be content

With the life I have

and the future I build.

I find fault

in the simple wishes of mine

silly and spoiled they may appear

and so I punish the thought

and stab guilt deep

into my bones.

And yet

I don’t need this pain

It serves no one but pain itself

And it won’t stop the fact

That these carnal desires

Are the only truths in the world

My desire to run and hide

to shield myself

from hurtful eyes.

To say what I mean

and mean what I say

never distorting

the absolute image

that is me.

To be myself

the only thing I have

that can bend to my will.

The truth

is that I am alive

and my desires are all

I really need to know.