“Cut me.” I shudder

at my words. My strange

agreement, the hard edged offspring

of an often inconvenient trust.

A submission to

One greater

than I. The stars testify

and the intricacies of ant life

demonstrate wisdom. So I

remain still, anticipating

more pain. Resolved

to not escape or avoid or medicate

or anesthetize. Though I may find a way

to be surprised, It will come. Perhaps

exact and acute, a surgeon's knife;

perhaps chaotic and

messy, a car crash. Whichever,

Oh God tether me

to Reality, to Love

that does not make

sense to or agree with

the me that You

are cutting away.

A boy once lived here,

who had sunshine to spare.

No problem too big,

his shoulder always there.

No quarrel too small,

too short, nor too long.

He’d lend you an ear,

criticize not one wrong.

Optimism inaccurate,

this boy shined too bright.

The glow of his smile

killed the coldest of nights.

The years passed him by,

yet he smiled harder still.

Vanquished despair!

Pain and anguish he killed.

He had talent much,

and arrogance few.

Spinning metaphors and axioms,

his heart simply true.

But he vanished one day,

’nary notes nor a trace!

And missed dearly he was,

that defiant, warm face.

'Twas but a month later;

what horrors they found!

No name could do justice,

no utterance, nor sound.

For that corpse of a boy

his skin taut and fair;

was none other than he,

who had sunshine to spare.

And there scrawled in blood,

on that cold wall of stone:

“The ones hurting most, without fail, bleed alone.”

Go inside the asylum

Where flesh rots away

You'll want to find a way out

They'll tell you drugs are the only escape

But happiness wasn't meant to be chemical

Like love was never meant to be a metaphor

We want more

More then days in a hungover mindset

We want more

More then memories we spend our lives trying to forget

All for fear or regret

Grow

Or admit that you are dead

Go inside the asylum

You're not awake yet

There are tiny lights

Escaping your lips

Those words of life you spoke

Now lighting some of your darkness

Your heart is like cracked concrete

Oh, you need to concentrate

If you want to be free,

You'll need to do far more then just hide away

Go inside the asylum

There are things waiting for you

Once you're inside

It's your choice what you'll do

A brush with the devil will strengthen your spine

Keep standing and you'll be fine

Keep your head,

Oh precious one

Prove to the world that you're not the crazy one

Go inside the asylum

See what media tries to disguise

See people tearing away their flesh

People determined to starve to death

People trying to die

When they've been given precious life

The ladies in white shoving pills down their throats

Pumping their veins full of poison but calling it hope

Go inside the asylum

See what it's really like inside

Maybe then you'll want more

More then rebellion and resentment

More then freedom and enlightenment

Go inside

Stay a while

Flesh rots in there, smell it in the air

You're sane, and they know it

You're okay, but they'll try to disprove it

This worlds an asylum

Learn to live and survive

Maybe your sanity will save a life

-ashleyanne

How now sweetheart you make me so happy", I love you he said.

You damn hoe" what the fuck am I doing with you in my life? You're nothing!

Honey you make me so happy, I can't believe you're mine. Another day at this and I end up crying.

Is he mad, he's so confusing, he wants me. Does he now? I don't know, I answered my question.

Honey thank you for breakfast and a wonderful night, it's now Monday and his eyes are bright.

It's weekend again and he's mad as hell. Come here you bitch! I gasp and begged for help.

Who are you begging no one can fucking hear you. What have I done now? I've been nothing but a good wife to you.

This took him by surprise and he hits me hard, blood splatters on the floor, the fridge and stains the wall.

I want to leave but how? I love him so and to him am bound.

Are you crazy, someone in my head ask. You'll die before you know it and for that I'm at lost.

He's here again and I'm scared. Honey am leaving you and for that he flared.

Leaving me? Are you mad? No I think you are I said as I listened to my heart.

His gun it's pointing at me then at himself and he cried and cried and cried.

I have a confession to make honey, I'm not the man you think I am I lied.

My eyes pop open chin to the floor and before I know what's happening so is his body. Breathless, he's breathing no more.

I found a note he had on him, it said therapy. Below written in bold is...

HONEY, PLEASE LEAVE. I love you but I can't stop and you'll end up dead before I can.