In Your Hands
Thank you for being such a good friend ro me
For believing when everyone else gave up on me
For being there when I had no where else to turn
For accepting me with all my warts
For loving me unconditionally
For those small and insignificant things
That make up a world of difference
In a life of service to you, and all others
Thank you for allowing me to accept myself
For allowing me to forgive myself again
For making it possible to forgive all things
In this field of all possibilities
Angel
How can I make you understand how hard it will be to live without your presence?
Without your loving loyalty shining through all the corners of your love for me
Your adoration no matter how ill you felt that day, how you always put me first
And I can never repay for you undying devotion my loving pet
And when I was ill or agitated your eternal empathy always shone through my clouded mind
You were always there for me and give me reason to smile, to love like no other before you
You could always make me feel so happy about my life, so long as you were there for me
And through out the years we lived together I would never have turn back the page never halving knowing your sweet love
And though you only departed from me scant hours ago
I feel your presence here still tonight, and the ghost of your remnant
For months and years to come I see you and hear you all around me
Not because you haunt me, but because your friendship and love will never leave me
You will always be with me now and forever
There will never be another like you my “Angel”
Blue Avian Orb
It is gathering dust outside the home I grew up in, and several of us are hunting small uplands game birds with shotguns.
Behind my house is a steep gullied depression that leads on down the “wagon trail” to the river below.
Where we hunters are kindred spirits, we don’t necessarily know each other, and are spread out as if in an armed man hunt.
As we descend into the smallish gorge, it is a steep decline to a rounded triangular plateau, before a further descent below.
As we climb down to the plateau, the bowl is covered in a thick fog, at which there appears to be a bright glowing, orb that can be vaguely made out at the bottom.
Apprehension grips at our senses, as we get closer to the circular disc, glowing first dimly, then more clearly as we pass through the obscuring blanket in front of us.
We stop our decent hoping time would help us discern, what truly lay beneath the fog, in time the air currents caused the sheen to lessen in obscurity, and allowed me to peer behind the veil.
What I saw next decimated my concept of reality, and shook me to my very foundation, as a tremor crippled my heart, turning it to ice.
Out my mouth came the baleful quavering of a lost and tortured soul, and I heard my own voice gasp out incredulously, “I…I can see your face”.
Two ominous shadows back lit by the radiance of the orb behind them, emerged from out of the mists that had been previously shrouding them, to reveal an entity with a terrifying larger than human, elongated shaped cranium, accompanied by an equally long protruding chin, not unlike a beak.
If this wasn’t enough to make your blood run cold, the face was without doubt the horror of it all, resembling a shriveled prune, deeply etched with jagged fissures running the length of its face in broken oblique equilateral striations.
Its eyes were wide and oblong like its head, glazed, darkened with the absence of any eye lids, nose or mouth of sort. The whole visage was completely emotionally disturbing, and unnerving, to the point of total panic.
These other world beings were extremely tall, eight feet or more, the first of which was covered in what appeared to be long blue feathers, the length of his stature, the second one with the robes of a priest or shaman.
After my initial verbal outburst of fear, it was obvious that they were aware of my presence now, and in my most horrifying moment of discovery, they immediately approached my location.
Feral panic gripped me and the flight or fight instinct caused me to try and scramble up the steep incline below my mother’s rock garden above, only to find its slope had turned to mud, as I slid down the slope to the lower plateau again.
Next the inevitable happened, as I saw the blue avian and his shaman speeding up to me, rolling like on a train track, their approach far too swift and menacing for me not to misinterpret their intention.
Again the feral fight or flight adrenaline rush consumed me, as I lashed out at the shaman who was encroaching and within striking difference, I cried out “you’re a fucking witch doctor”.
My hand met the wooden wall behind my lower buck, and not the shaman’s beak, and I realized it was just another night terror, as my heart pounded wildly subsiding into laughter.
I realized in my mad fear and misinterpretation of an alien contact, I had robbed myself understanding, and maybe making a lasting friendship of two sky brothers.
Every Step
Every step, I get closer to
This dream I have, that includes you too
Every day, I get further from
The past that haunts me, from becoming from
That other man, I don’t want to be
Transparent soul, that I just can’t see
Every day, is become one
Until I do, I can’t get done
This kind of sick can hurt you bad
Bend your will, and make you sad
There are visions, I don’t want to see
Make me angry, not the man I want to be
This dream I have, is blessed by stars
Far from a slavery, and free from bars
This dream I have, I’m not the only one
If only me then, who will get it done
A naked beast is what I am
Running wild, against the man
Nothing more, than what you want to be
Just a free man in society
Give me freedom, or give me death
The choice is yours, but give me breath
My heart is beating, but only now
I see the future, I don’t know how?
Every Step
Every step, I get closer to
This dream I have, that includes you too
Every day, I get further from
The past that haunts me, from becoming from
That other man, I don’t want to be
Transparent soul, that I just can’t see
Every day, is become one
Until I do, I can’t get done
This kind of sick can hurt you bad
Bend your will, and make you sad
There are visions, I don’t want to see
Make me angry, not the man I want to be
This dream I have, is blessed by stars
Far from a slavery, and free from bars
This dream I have, I’m not the only one
If only me then, who will get it done
A naked beast is what I am
Running wild, against the man
Nothing more, than what you want to be
Just a free man in society
Give me freedom, or give me death
The choice is yours, but give me breath
My heart is beating, but only now
I see the future, I don’t know how?
The Urn That Holds A Soul
A women was created to be loved, to be cherished
To be desired, by a man her natural compliment
To be found, and protected from the hostile elements
A women’s love like no nectar any man has ever known
Her warmth, her kindness, her admiration so tantamount to him
Her touch, her tears to fall on his brawny chest
His tender response, his awakening excitement
His mad passion to fill her most intimate desires
She only wanting the two made one
The yin and yang the root of all creation
A new soul yearning to be conceived
Struggling for a life to express its sire and dame
A man was created to love a women
Someone, something to pour his soul into
All the while dying to give her someone to look up to
Something she can believe in and get behind
His strength, his drive, his ambition, so vaunted to her
His willing to live and die for what he believes in
His steadfast commitment to her love and his young
Him only wanting to be there for her need
To fill her with the outpouring of his love
Like a vessel that fills the urn of her soul
Like a soul that hold his own
Music…how it affects us so, what kind of touch it commands on our souls, our emotions?
We live inside a world summoned up by a spirit of someone else’s experience, a salutation, happiness, sorrow, that feeling inside us
Called as it were from our past, our hopes, our dreams, a moment in time, the spaces between the notes
We are quickened by the emphasis of the measures, the expression of the stanzas, the bridge back from hence we came, the strength of the magic of lyrics
No one understands where that well is found, where the angels that dwell, they that spirit us away and to the afterworld
We just know it is a chariot which pulls life and death together as one
We are lost in the moment of eternity, as it exists forever and never, it brings out the god in us
The well of life spring where we learn our first memories of emotions, that blessing and curse of why we are here
Courage and compassion cause us to commune with the divine, and we are made to understand the meaning of music of love