The Waltz
Richard was always considered the most exemplary husband. It was beyond love at first sight, in the sense that I knew I loved him before I even met him. He filled a deep, cavernous hole inside of me that I feared would consume me soon enough. Even now, as we enjoy our wine and laugh in the living room, I feel a sort of nostalgia for what we once were.
He first caught my eye at a mutual friends New Year's Party. The way he walked and talked enthralled me. His handsome face and charming smile were calling to me. He made his rounds in the room, seemingly greeting every table. When he naturally arrived at mine, I knew. We talked all night, stole kisses even before midnight and danced until dawn. We've been inseparable since.
My love for Richard grew rapidly and in between the little things that he did. He reassured me like no other did. He would awake early and make me breakfast before heading out to work. He would help around the house, make sure that everything was always in its place. He helped me throw away an array of items I no longer needed, and that's an insane feat for me, seeing as I don't let go of things easily. He would brush my hair, buy me expensive gifts and my family absolutely adored him. It was obvious he would be an excellent father because quite plainly, he was an excellent person.
In general, he was amazing company. Richard knew how to work a room and make people laugh. He struck up conversation everywhere we went. His utter excitement for life was completely contagious.
Richard also adored animals. It was impossible for him to resist any cuddle with any animal. Should we spot a stray animal, whether it be cats or dogs, they would indeed be coming home with us. Sometimes the house looked like a zoo. Luckily, Richard was so well connected, he would find ever animal loving parents soon enough.
One of the more interesting aspects of Richard's personality was his knack for dancing. He would always incorporate a quick move wherever we were knowing it never failed to make me laugh. A quick foxtrot in line at the grocery store, a swing at the bank, at our own wedding we spent the entire night on the floor.
For the most part, nobody would notice his gentle humming and quick sway, but I always would. The only exception being last month at his annual work Christmas party, when he began his greatest quickstep yet, with his coworker Diana. They tangoed, waltzed and foxtrotted the entire month of January there in his very office. Right under my eyes. Until Richard, being the effortless conversationalist he is, had to keep the dance going by text messages and naked photos. It would be a lie to say I didn't consider looking the other way. Our marriage was too perfect to just throw away. But as I said before, it's very difficult for me to let go.
My perspective of him shifted as quickly as it had first formed. Only now, I see him for what he truly is. A fool. I see him as he waltzes his way to the wine, I poured for him. I see him as he almost completely chugs it and ignores the faint almond scent radiating from it. This bothers me most, as though he needs to be drunk to endure my company. So much so he is mindless when it comes to his drink. Finally, I see him as he begins to writhe in agony. I see him as he takes his final breath and dies. And just as it once was, the hole inside me is empty and filled with something a bit different from love.