Behind the Smile

I like to describe myself as outgoing.

Outgoing because I enjoy talking with people,

outgoing because I'm not afraid to say "hi" to a random stranger,

and outgoing because I refuse to stand by and wait for another person to say "hi."

I also like to describe myself as friendly.

Friendly because I'm not afraid to befriend random people,

friendly because I adore people for who they are and not by their "labels"

and friendly because I would do anything to put a smile on someone else's face...

than my own.

But of course, no one sees that,

no one notices it,

and no one cares.

They take advantage of my kindness;

using their words,

and false kindness as tricks to getting what they want from me.

They think that just because I'm outgoing,

talkative,

friendly,

and nice that I'm vulnerable...

when they don't know the other side of me.

The other side that's full of painful flashbacks.

Flashbacks of all the hard times,

of all the pain,

of all the loneliness,

and of all the tears I went through before becoming the person I am today.

The person who has learned to be strong,

to not so much as let my guard down with anyone,

and to always hide her pain with a smile.

I may seem vulnerable,

or weak for there's many times where someone will damage me,

but it doesn't mean I'm not strong.

I'm at least faking a smile to show that I'm alright.