I never found out what his name is.

He walks through the trendy area of the Red Mile in the downtown of Calgary.

I see him daily, at least from Monday to Friday as I drive my bus through on the way out of the deep inner core where skyscrapers dominate the skyline. At night, this place teems with the bright and beautiful people. Or on a game night, Calgary Flames fans dress in some form of jersey or red in support of the NHL team they love.

On an early Monday morning, 6:10 am to be exact, I see him begin his walk. At least I assume it's the beginning as I see him there every day withing a five minute time frame, and in front of the same apartment building. He's short. He's got a bad leg, supported by a grimy ancient air boot. He moves so slowly it is barely perceptible. Yet in forty-five minutes when I come back on the other side of the road, he will be the best part of a kilometer away. He's close to the McDonalds where I am loading office workers in a hurry for the last C-Train from downtown to the connectors which will get them to work.

At the brightly lit, 50's style fast food joint, I see him struggle with the door. His crutches are so old they are still wooden. The sun makes the wood light up as it rises. He wears a thick grey sweater under an army green winter coat. It won't matter what the season is, this uniform is always the same. His grey hair lights up with silver highlights where strands lay limp against his jacket peeking out from under a dark blue toque. His beard is long, but never matted. Darker grey, there are strands of black woven between the white which reminds me of Santa Claus.

I wonder how bad his arthritis is. His hands are gnarled with swollen joints. He takes the mittens he wears off trying to get a better grip on the door. Inside, a kid munching on breakfast looks up and comes to the door to help. It's a normal event. I've seen a dozen different people stant up to perform the same duty. The old man, and I assume he's old because of his hair and the slight hump to his back, smiles. I can see it in the reflection in the glass pane between him and the help he needs.

Even now, ten years later, when I drive the same route from early morning to late evening, I can spot his white head moving between the stream of pedestrians. He still moves at the same turtle pace. He still gets through his day in spite of the obstacles in his way. He embodies determination. It inspires me in a way no other regular passenger or person I see in the course of a day ever will. The little miracles you see if you open your eyes will amaze you.

We met online by pure coincidence. Just two out of the fifty-something people participating in some random conversation about each others struggles. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a notification. ding! "Bòkko has sent you a friend request. [Accept] [Decline]

I remember seeing that username. It was one of the people in the online discussion. 'Hmm,' I think to myself after checking out their profile (which you should always do when you get a friend request online), 'They seem interesting enough, why not?'' I click [Accept], And no more than a split second later, they've sent a message.

"Hey there! :)" They said. Slightly surprised at their speedy messaging, I responded.

"Hello! Nice to meet you :D" I reply. Somehow, we instantly clicked. We spent the whole night talking and joking, and that night, after about three week's worth of restless sleep, I slept soundly. Perhaps too soundly, because the next day I woke up at 1:13 in the afternoon, with five unread messages from Bòkko. Over the next few days, we seemed to get to know each other quite well. She was an open book, and if you know what to look for, so am I. They are a great friend, and we compliment each other like burgers and fries (an odd comparison, I realize as I look back and edit this). I know it's only been a few weeks since I've met them, but I may like them more than just a friend. Maybe it's too soon to tell. Regardless, they are my friend and I love them for putting up with my nerdy shenanigans.

Though I am sure there is a great percentage where involuntary celibacy is a chosen line of thought and actively lived, I would like to present the small percent where this condition of thought and action are not purposefully chosen, but used as a survival method.

Abuse, including specifically both sexual and physical, among men and women has risen from 89,241 (2009) to 144,300 (2021) in rape statistics; 1 out of 5 women and 1 out of 10 men. I am referring to the 1 out of ten men. For Sexual abuse: 1 out of every 5 boys are sexually abused before the age of 18. Even more then this because 30% of abuse isn’t reported, and for every abusive action that is, two more are likely to go unreported, and 38% of boys are abused by women. These are the men I will be referring to in the small percentage mentioned above.

80% of 21 year olds had a psychological disorder because of the physical and emotional trauma, especially when abuse is started before age 6.

so where does this all tie in?

As an abuse victim, during abuse the child (he, she) will find any way to protect themselves. Whether drugs to numb the pain, voluntarily sex to forget forced sexual experiences, walls to hide behind, withdrawing away from all and anyone. Severe trust issues are common, emotional instability along with (sometimes severe)constant panic and anxiety attacks, suicidal thoughts and/or suicide.

Cloud this with the grief mad fear some experience by losing to death someone they love because of abuse, (1,708 in 2021 children died of abuse) plus more because of unreported abuse.

Now I am not saying that we cannot hold people to their actions, but by doing so, we must take in consideration of why.

For example:

Problem: A thirty year old man kills his mother.

Why: His mother was sexually abusive in his teenage years and was the cause of his sisters death.

What he did wasn't right, we could call him a murderer, but isn’t the mother also a murderer? We could sentence him to prison, rightfully, but wouldn’t counseling be also a better addition to prison?

We may not be able to stop those who choose this line of thinking, but we can save those who turn to it as a coping method of trauma and survival method of their instabilities and psychological disorders.

Abuse is common. Sadly most people don’t realize it happens so frequently, in any socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, and within any religions.

And we can’t stop all of it, but we can give these victims the gift of understanding their why, and helping them.

Note: If you are in an abusive situation, tell someone. Trust me, it is not worth it and you don’t have to protect anyone. You don’t have to just survive, there is a freedom to live on the other side of this valley, all you have to do is tell someone. ( preferably the police, especially if you or your family is in danger)

hotlines:

Child Help USA: 800-422-4453

Covenant House Nineline: 800-999-9999

RAINN: www.rainn.org

The National Sexual Assault: 800-656- HOPE

Victims of Crime Resource Center: 800-842-8467

Youth Crisis: 800-448-4663

By Edwin McDowell

Dec. 20, 1981

The New York Times Archives

''Everything about being published is disappointing,'' said the novelist Helen Yglesias. ''It's just a very bitter experience today for almost everybody. And because there is such widespread disaffection among writers, I think that for the first time in the history of publishing and book writing there is a strong possibility that a writers union will succeed.

During a three-day American Writers Congress in New York this fall, speaker after speaker criticized an array of publishing practices - from the perceived unwillingness of conglomerate publishers to publish noncommercial books to the methods of reporting royalties. On the final evening, more than 1,000 delegates voted overwhelmingly to form a writers union.

''We knew there was interest in a union, but we were overwhelmed by the size of the vote,'' said Andrea Eagan, a freelance writer who is on the organizing committee for the National Writers Union.

At a meeting in Town Hall, hundreds of delegates to the congress anted up $10 each to start the organizational drive and agreed to help the organizing effort in their hometowns. As a result, and buoyed by the apparent success of unions representing screenwriters, journalists and graphic artists, and by gains won by authors unions in a dozen foreign countries, an advance guard of writers throughout the country is choosing delegates for a National Writers Union they expect to launch next year.

They are also preparing a list of grievances to tack on the door of Publishers' Row. But as Laurie Stone, writer and union organizer, said, ''This can't be like conventional unions, because people work at home and deal with a variety of employers.''

''The National Labor Relations Board does not provide for a mechanism for unions to represent such people,'' said Lewis M. Steel, a labor lawyer who is advising the writers' organizing effort. ''To be certified for collective bargaining, you must be an employee of a particular employer.'' But he does not consider that an insurmountable problem.

''There's a whole series of ways in which writers can organize even in the absence of certification,'' Mr. Steel said. ''For example, the Graphic Artists Guild represents thousands of graphic artists across the country who would probably have trouble getting N.L.R.B certification, yet it represents its members in a meaningful way.'' His advice is to organize first, build a broad base, then worry about the details. The national writers union has attracted few big names so far and organizers acknowledge that many aspiring writers care more about the psychic satisfaction of a byline than about the economic and professional issues that concern union supporters.

''But these are the usual problems confronting union organizers,'' Mrs. Eagan said. ''Writers aren't immune to arguments that having been successful, perhaps it would be the right thing for them to extend a hand to the less successful.''

Whatever form it will take, the union will have a competitor in the Federation of Professional Writers of America, which was formed about a year ago and boasts about 150 published writers as members. The young organization recently affiliated with the National Production Workers Union of Chicago. ''The N.L.R.B recently gave them the right to organize independent workers, the first time that's ever happened,'' said Julian Portman, a literary agent and the executive secretary of the federation.

Headquartered in Hollywood, the Federation plans to open branch offices early next year in Dallas, Chicago, Kansas City and Pittsburgh. Two Unions, One Constituency. Mr. Portman is critical of the organizing effort begun by the Writers Congress. He said his union has some of the same goals, but that, while the national writers union movement seems to regard publishers as total adversaries, the Federation will seek to cooperate where possible. For example, ''Every year $1 million is written off by publishers for authors' advances that don't result in manuscripts,'' he said. ''We would try to persuade the authors to return the money or produce the manuscript.''

Organizers for the writers union say their motivation is to help writers, not wage war against publishers - but not everyone is convinced. ''In retrospect I was more than a little naive in thinking that the Writers Congress would represent a coming together of many segments of the writing and publishing community,'' said Thomas H. Ginzburg, the former head of Viking Press. The Ginzburg Fund, established in memory of his father Harold, who founded Viking, provided the seed money for the Writers Congress, sponsored by the National Institute. ''I incorrectly assumed that there'd be a concerted effort to explain that the contractual basis of book publishing is an enterprise of commerce based on professionalism and goodwill between writer and publisher. I hoped there'd be opportunities to explore why that kind of trust and confidence and goodwill has vanished.''

One of the biggest reasons they have vanished, according to many writers, can be summed up in the single word ''royalties'' - everything from what Mr. Steel described as ''the alarming trend of publishers asking writers to accept lower royalties'' to the way those royalties are computed and reported on the semi-annual royalty statements. Writers complain that few publishers provide understandable statistics on gross sales, net sales and returns, give little or no information about the number of copies printed or sold, and often keep authors' subsidiary rights income for months without paying interest.

''My biggest concern is that we'll be blamed by every would-be writer who submits an unpublishable manuscript or everytime a book flops in the marketplace,'' said one publisher, ''But with all that resentment toward publishers out there, it would be suicidal for us to ignore it.''

(Note: Julian Portman was my literary agent in Chicago from 1989 - 2001 when he died of an untimely heart attack at his home in Skokie, IL.)

It's all one big conspiracy, I tell you. There are 9 billion of us; what are a few blue balls and parched kitties compared to that?

Well, it might not be so important at this very moment since we have toys to play with and, ahem, medicine. Anyway...

The real stuff is always better, is it not? If we continue like this for the next, say, hundred years, we'll certainly go batshit crazy at some point.

You can only take so much plastic into your inner sanctum.

We'd start killing for it, for just one flesh-on-flesh contact; for that connection our bodies make as they rub together.

Friction is more addictive than any drug.

And besides, too much chemical exposure can't be good for the body! Moderation is the best option.

This might not be what you asked for, but it's the best I could come up with.

A bit of humor never killed anybody.

On the other hand—no pun intended—blue balls might.

Modern society is seemingly racing towards progression. Riots and acts of destruction are on the rise. These conflicts have offset our once harmonious planet. Harmony is about being part of a greater global society that constantly strives for efficient progress towards a peaceful environment for the betterment of future global citizens.

Conflicts allow us to pursue improper and unnecessary motives. This is evident in war and conflict-ridden areas such as Ukraine and Russia, Syria and the DR Congo river conflict. To create a structured civilization, we must diminish political injustice, cases of financial instability, religious dissimilarities and lack of communication; these factors lead to conflicts such as the incident between the provinces of South Kivu and Maniema. This dispute was primarily caused due to a disagreement regarding sharing of the resources provided by the river. Such disputes put the people at risk. The ACODIF, a Congolese peace organization, however, issued a peace treaty that brokered the once fought over land to restore the balance in DR Congo. This is a righteous example of the possibilities we have to better our world.

The only way we can move towards a better world is to obtain this harmony. We humans need to learn how to live in harmony to provide for future generations. Harmony must be nurtured and cherished. We need to learn from our previous mistakes; political warfare, misuse of power, and racial backlashes are all solid reasons why we should shift our train of thought from reckless to harmonious bliss. To come up with solutions to counter strife worldwide, we must look back at its causes. One planet, one person. We are all alike in various ways; we need to embrace and protect each other. A key to solving problems such as discrimination and injustice is giving all people a fair opportunity to be trained into responsible citizens.

Once we implement these habits into our daily life, we’ll start to notice the changes they bring; overall, pursuing harmony as the main motive for life will bring in ample benefits to societies and their inhabitants. Peace and harmony are fundamental prerequisites of our life and are an ideal path to follow. Improvement of infrastructure and possible funding will be dominant in various areas of development. Public services/facilities will also be more appealing and better to use. Choosing to live in harmony will transcend borders and create stronger political ties among governments. Living in calm and inert habitats provides psychological benefits as well. Some are a clear mindset and higher rates of productivity. It would improve our overall mindset and mood. Being at peace and in harmony with each other and our environment will set off a more vibrant vibe in our global community.

Harmony is a state which we need to conquer. To establish a prosperous society, the wiser people take the path of peace and harmony. Without peace and harmony in a nation, it is impossible to achieve political strength, economic stability, or cultural growth. Before transmitting the notion of peace and harmony, among others, an individual needs to possess peace within them while their body and mind should be in balance. Even one person can transmit the notion of peace and harmony, among others, and it is everyone 's responsibility to maintain that peace and harmony in society.

Technology has made the world more 'connected' than ever. The use of technology has increased throughout the decade. It has provided us more access to information, expanded opportunities for social media connections, shopping and even playing games with people on the other side of the planet – all from the comfort of our own homes. From referring to an article to messaging a peer, we utilize technology every day and hardly apprehend how important it has become to us. Some individuals differ. We have a connection via the internet, yet this action is incomparable to a physical impression. So are these advancements enhancing our lives or just making us more cut off from the real world?

We need to develop social skills with our peers. It is the opposite of lying behind a computer. Social media and video gaming, the two most common uses of technology, lack decent human interaction. Many individuals tend to be in ‘non-physical’ reach, because they fear they may be at risk of being judged professionally, often found among introverts. Psychologists showed that human interaction is a catalyst that improves happiness and leads a prosperous life.

Research suggests that the use of the internet is the primary source of depression and loneliness. Depression often occurs in age groups teens to adults. Social media often causes people to become desperate, dependent and delirious pondering over websites and socials more than personal connections. Such activities cause damage to the mental state of health that is, depression, anxiety and various others. The most effective way to prevent such anomalies is to have frequent human interaction.

Not only does the extensive use of technology cause loneliness, but it also provides people with negative personality traits. The most common being narcissism, racism and much more unpolite attributes. These characteristics weaken an essential skill, being social. It can cause hate against the person, which can cause psychological issues ranging from despair to stress. These attributes also can destroy an individual's core values, causing changes in their personalities.

Despite these concerns, the internet is quite a tool. It has formed the world's largest association, a global community. We can access a pool of different websites from all around the world. Technology also provides us with infinite sources of knowledge. It makes it easier to apprehend information and be productive.

All in all, technology is a treasured tool. People must limit there time on the internet as well as utilize when it is necessary to prevent future obstacles. Along with this, balance your social time among your peers. How do you think technology has impacted you as a person, what can you do to improve or prevent those occurrences?

Before I started working in a daycare, I felt that I was fairly well-prepared for the job. But one thing that I was not prepared for was how many philosophical discussions children have.

I guess it shouldn’t surprise me. Everything is so new to them. A four or five-year-old child has the intelligence to think and reason, but he doesn’t have experience of the world. There’s so much that he doesn’t know, and so much that he wants to know! It makes sense that kids are so full of questions.

Most of the time, my solution was to let the children have their discussions and come up with their own answers. Many of them were parroting what they had heard their parents say or what they heard in church. But there was one answer that I will never forget.

During a discussion about God, one little preschool girl proclaimed that “God is the king of church!”Honestly, I couldn't argue with her!

Society doesn't care about incels until one of them drives his car into a crowd. But incels are not just guys, there are also women who are incels and society still doesn't care. Why? Because society is cruel, different people have various levels of what woke people like to call privilege and incels seem to be at the bottom of the pecking order. How do we know this? Because if they weren't, they wouldn't be incels.

There are two other posts so far in this challenge. One from a woman making fun of incels and implying that incels are guys will probably end up shooting up a resteraunt of something and another from a guy who is saying that women can dish it out but they can't take it. Both posts disgust me because an incel is a real person who for whatever reason (self inflicted or not) will never experience true intimacy with another person and society really doesn't care about that. Society only cares when it affects people with a higher social status.

It's not just sex that people need. It's purpose. Life. Protraction.

Fucking's not quite all it takes to breed sweet satisfaction.

The gent is wanking off to whores who tell him to drop dead.

The virgin reads erotica. It's going to her head.

He's bitter. lost. Ready to bleed if it'll get him action.

She's empty. Broken. Craving seed and earthly interaction...

Hormones seep out from their pores and meddle with their brains.

Lonesomeness invades their cores and oozes through their veins.

Neither sex needs sex alone,

But precious understanding; connection to continuum.

(A good fuck notwithstanding.)

It's all too easy for each one to call the other shallow,

When getting off is just for fun and consciousness falls sallow.

Depression sags with tit and sack,

grows heavy,

pulls us under.

Then reeling from the lack of love leaves lust a lofty wonder.

We need each other to relate.

We need to bond; to pair; to mate.

To spill our souls across the earth.

To matter.

To create.